Can I just admit something? Some days, I have no idea how I'm going to raise $15,500. I've let fear get the best of me on more days than one; and I've listened, if even for a split second, to the lie that this ambition ought to be put to rest. Because it's easy to put God in the boxes that I create, right?
But here's the truth I know: I have more people cheering me on, supporting me, loving me, and encouraging me to pursue this calling than I know what to do with, really. It's been incredible the way Jesus sends someone my way right as it seems my doubts will overcome me.
SO, a few weeks ago, my sweet friend told me she would plan a spaghetti dinner fundraiser for me (as I've not taken much initiative in the fundraising realm because of my fears-NOT COOL, LAUREN.). "I'll take care of everything. You don't need to worry about it." Anyone who knows me knows that's easier said than done. I continuously questioned pretty much everything about the plans leading up to the actual dinner. Too bad…
Look out though, people, because our God is BIG.
Over the course of the next few days, I had several people from my internship donate a huge amount of food. Two of my lovely classmates and friends donated all the desserts. Friends and strangers alike let me use their cooking supplies. My heart was overwhelmed. But it didn't stop there. I came home one day to a significant donation sitting on my front porch.
It said, "From Jesus in disguise."
I'll come back to that.
The fundraiser was beyond blessed. I have no words to describe how much support I felt that night because I feel like no words can capture what it meant to me to see so many people (some I didn't even know) in the same place who were interested in the next step. So for those who were there in person and in spirit, and to Jesus in disguise, I cannot say enough: THANK YOU.
I saw a quote once by John Steinbeck: "I wonder how many people I've looked at all my life and never seen."
This is one of the most terrifying thoughts I've ever pondered. Because one or all of those people could have been Jesus in disguise. Yet, even if they weren't Jesus, even if they were just regular human beings, they are beautiful and beloved creations of my Jesus. And that very fact is reason enough for me to love them, not overlook them. As I continue to prepare my heart for this trip, my prayer is to begin to truly see people, starting now.
