Here is a list of all the things I brought with me to
training camp:
-Enough clothes to wear something clean each day
-2 pairs of shoes
-Expectations of being on a team with Godly men
-Doubt in finding “my place” in our large Squad
-Toiletries (which my shampoo leaked onto my tooth brush
*gross tasting*)
-My right to privacy/personal time
-A bible, pens, and journal
– Sleeping bag, pad, and tent (all bright green)
-Worry of training being intense to the point of overwhelming
-Pride
-Head lamp
-Jesus
While at training camp my pack seemed so heavy and full of
so much stuff. After the first night I noticed that this backpack was not going
to work. How was I going to lug/carry all of this around for the next week; let
alone for the next 11 months? Something
needed to go and it needed to go now!
I began to unpack right then and there. The first to go were
the clothes. I was going to re-wear shirts and pants until the cows came home
(great Wisconsin reference). Next, I
gave away my worry of training camp being too intense. After going through a
couple of the challenges at camp, such as being unable to use anything from my
pack for a day, I realized I was now a part of a loving community. These people
shared everything they had as well as love from Jesus.
The week went along with plenty of worship time, cultural meals
served in one bowl for a table of 8 people, team building exercises, and real
life scenarios of what can happen while out on the mission field. I began to
feel at peace until we started forming teams….
We have a Squad of about 57 people and we are placed into
teams of 6-7 people. This way, when we travel to all the countries as a squad
we can break out into ministry teams spreading the word throughout the country.
Given that we only have so many men on
our Squad some of the teams would be made up of all women.
When we started the team forming process I was consistently placed
on all women teams. How is this fair? (I thought to myself) I deserve to be a
team with Godly men who can protect and lead. I have been praying for the men
on my team for months. Who had I been praying for then?
Within a day the teams were final and I was on an all girl
team. I was upset and honest with my team that I know this is God’s will but, I
was angry and needed time to process. All of the women felt the same way.
(knowing women…) It
did not take long for all of us on our fierce women’s team to change our
thoughts/feelings and see how God had planned this team perfectly. There are so
many things we see about our team now that we didn’t before. We are going to be
able to go deeper with each other, be more exposed, and have a bond that only we
as women can have. Our team name is BATTLE CRY. We know we are called to be
warriors for the nations. We are called to cry out to our Lord for the nations
as we shower them with prayers for healing, strength, providence, and salvation
through Christ.
At the start of camp Jesus fit uncomfortable in my pack. I
carried around things I can’t bring on the race when I leave in July like:
-Expectations of being on a team with Godly men
-Doubt in finding “my place” in our large Squad
-My right to privacy/personal time
-Worry of the race being intense to the point of overwhelming
-Pride
The sooner I let go of these things the more room I will
have to bring more of Jesus, more of the Holy Spirit, and an overall increase
of love to serve God with all I have.
This next year I am going to give up a lot. I have to give
up loved ones, family and friend weddings, comfort, opportunities, privacy, and
expectations. Although, I am gaining so much more like seeing Christ throughout
the nations, an intense truthful community, adventures in serving, new memories
around the world, and advancing the kingdom of Heaven.
As this next year will be a challenge for me I challenge
you–What do you have in your “pack” that is unnecessary to lug around? What
can you let go of in your life to make more room for God?
God bless you!
