I’ve had the opportunity to be gainfully unemployed for most of the month of August. During this time, I’ve focused on catching up with friends I haven’t seen in a while. Last weekend I found myself in New Mexico and this weekend I got to hike/camp in and around Zion (southern Utah) for a few days and nights. Running has been the recurring theme for both trips. In New Mexico I got to support some friends who ran a half marathon and in Utah I spent all weekend with a friend who regularly runs 50 mile races. Running has many merits – it’s an easy way to stay fit when traveling, requires minimal gear, allows you to explore your surroundings, relieves stress, and it can be a social or solo sport.
I am NOT a runner.
I love to rock climb, do yoga, hike long distances, swim, Latin dance, backpack, play ultimate Frisbee, or do pretty much any other active thing you can think of. But for the love of all things good and holy, please don’t ever ask me to “run” (interpret “run” as jog a little then walk more) anything more than a fun 5k. If you do, there’d better be techno music, glow sticks, and/or people throwing powdered colors at me to make it worth my time and energy. I enjoy being active, but running has always been both physically and emotionally difficult. In late high school I developed something called “exercise-induced asthma,” despite spending four hours a day practicing as a competitive swimmer. After several pretty bad experiences where running caused me to have some pretty scary asthma attacks, I find that the mere idea of running is quite intimidating. If you know me, then you’ve probably figured out that this means that running now coexists in my life as an arch nemesis and major goal.
I’ve tried to start running on my own a few times, and each time I give up after a few weeks of misery. I even asked a tri athlete coach/friend to check out my running form to make sure it looked O.K. so I wouldn’t hurt myself if I started running more. He and I set an appointment and went out running along well-groomed trail. Poor guy, he had to trot along next to me while I trudged on, literally dripping sweat, mouth wide open, and gasping for air. We “ran” (see above definition) a measly two miles. TWO MILES. You know how running is supposed to make you feel great because it causes you to sweat out all sorts of toxins and release a bunch of feel-good endorphins? Well, I have an impressive ability to remain cranky despite these factors. After this running venture, when the sting of misery and embarrassment had diffused slightly, I realized that if I really think about it and I’m totally honest, I let my pride defeat me that day.
So why am I rambling on about running? Fortunately for my pride, running is the exact activity I need on the WR to maintain some level fitness and my sanity. So I’ve decided to sign up for a 10K. Those 6.2 miles might not seem like very much, but the race is held at 8,500 feet and the trail goes through a great deal of fairly rough terrain. This race is probably going to destroy me and my pride. The race is only 5 weeks from now, but if I don’t get my act together and sign up, it may never happen.
And that’s the theme of what I’m learning right now- discipline. Our society teaches us to want and expect instant gratification. However, there are things we’re- I’m- not naturally good at and we- I- have to pursue with great discipline to get better (or in my case with running, to be able to do them at all). I'm not going to be able to run well after trying it once, and I'm not going to simply absorb things about the bible and God by listening to my pastor or reading my bible every once in a while.
I resented rote practices embedded in the church for many years – too much back story to explore here – because to me they seemed to be nothing more than habitual practice, meaningful only because they were tradition. What I’m slowly discovering, however, is that I learn, grow, and flourish when I practice being disciplined at things. Like running. And reading my bible. For the many years I’ve been a “Christian,” I wish I knew more of what’s in the bible. In fact, I’m often too embarrassed to admit my relatively limited knowledge of the bible and how few verses I can recite (are you starting to see a theme of developing humility?). I can’t learn if I don’t study and I certainly won’t study regularly unless I discipline myself to practice studying.
So here’s the takeaway. I’m doing new things and hard things and developing discipline in multiple aspects of my life as I explore new ways to prepare for the WR and the rest of my life. Also, it wouldn’t hurt for you to check in after Sept. 21 to see if I’m still able to use my legs.
Love you all! And thanks again for journeying with me.
