“What if you don’t raise the money?”
I get this question quite a bit from well meaning friends (and strangers) who are a little sticker-shocked at the price of my trip. I can’t blame them- the trip price, with insurance, medical expenses, gear, student loan payments while I’m gone, and a little spending money, all add up to a number I have trouble even admitting to myself.
It’s a lot of money. It’s so huge, this mission God has called me to, and the price is no small thing. It’s stressful to think about it and I am finding that the emotional toil of preparing for this trip is way beyond anything I could have imagined. I know next year there will be many moments where I step back- in frustration, amazement, or pure sleep-deprived exhaustion- and think, “Whoa! What have I signed up for?!” but I had no idea that I would be having those moments now.
This is too much for me. Please. Hear me when I say this. I cannot do this. I physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, am not capable of doing this- raising the money, stepping onto an airplane, and leaving my world for 11 months. No part of me thinks that I will be successful in my own strength.
This is where fear lives. This is where fear tries relentlessly to plant roots and grow until I abandon the dream God has placed within me. Fear is the enemy’s way of stoping me- by convincing me I have to do this on my own, that I am totally alone.
I cannot do this by myself, and, thankfully, I don’t have to. I am called to focus my eyes on Christ, move forward in faith, and He will provide where he has called. Refocusing my eyes on Christ is where I am right now; rediscovering and strengthening the passionate relationship I have with my Savior. Remembering all he has done for me, how he loves me, and seeking to know more and more about him. I am shifting my focus back to him.
Moving forward in faith is stretching… it’s the sending support letters, talking with churches, taking those moments that the Lord prompts me to reach out to others… all when I would rather pull into myself and stay quiet.
“…That’s all well and good- but what if you don’t raise the money?”
I firmly believe and have faith that the World Race is something the Lord has called me to do. So, if I don’t raise the money in time- I’ll still go on the World Race. I may have to defer, wait, go on a different route that launches later… but I am going on the World Race.
I will, no doubt, be disappointed if I have to defer. My squad is amazing and, even though our relationships are in the beginning stages, I know they would be great people to serve alongside. I love my route- I am excited for the countries I will be going to and I am already praying for the people I will be meeting… but the Lord is still in control. He has a plan, he has simply invited me to join in what he is already doing- I just have to be patient and trust.
“So, where are you at financially?”
I originally wrote this blog in August but updated it November 12, 2015. As of right now, I have raised $5,594- with a small portion of that being pledged dollars. My next deadline is December 18th; I have to have $10,000 in my World Race account by then- if I don’t, I don’t launch (leave) in January. I have two other deadlines while on the field- totaling to $16,962 by the end of April 2016.
God is good and he is trustworthy- even when the path seems impossible.
Thank you to those who have partnered with me so far… you are all such a blessing. Your encouraging words, prayers, and financial support are invaluable to me.
Blessings,
Laura
