Day 2:
This day in my processing journey was a lot harder than the previous. God was a little more harsh with me. Well, a lot more. He said things to me in a way that would make me sit up and listen. The second half of His 2 page speech was an affirmation of His love, and a lot gentler than the first half, but it still had some hard things to grasp in it. Let me start at the beginning.
1. Stop complaining
2. Start trusting in His goodness
3. Put Him first. Completely first. Always.
4. Stop relying on others (take responsibility for my relationship with God)
5. Accept His love
6. Give Him control
7. Take the opportunities I’m given to be His hands and feet
There is more than a little to chew on in that list. These are not the easiest of things to do, and especially not all at once. Although, as I look at them now these are all the things I have been learning to do this year. I guess that’s why God said to me near the end of His speech “Don’t let go of all the truth you have gained this year. It’s been a battle and now you have to stand your ground. Don’t let them take it.”
believe,
give up control,
unwavering,
unrelenting,
dependence,
reliance,
no doubt,
no fear,
blessed,
God’s timing,
first response,
peace,
worthy,
never alone,
best interest,
guidance,
obedience,
hope,
justified,
faith,
confident.
I can trust God that He will protect, be merciful, love, never leave, provide, listen, redeem, have grace, give peace, comfort, care, carry, keep promises, never betray, bring freedom, guiide, never change, save, teach, forgive.
God showed me how I was a lot like the Israelites. Within the first 2 years in the desert they
1. Faced hardships
2. Forgot God’s provision/protection
3. Began to complain
-They had a lack of faitih, which showed they didn’t know how to trust God.
My journey in the two weeks since the Joburg event was very similiar to their two years in the desert. I faced a hardship, I forgot about God’s protection and then I complained, demonstrating my lack of trust.
God is a funny guy. I spent all day thinking about trust, and learning what it means to trust. Again I picked up my Bible to read the next part of Jeremiah and the daily devotional was all about trust. It always amazes me how God confirms what He is saying to me through outside sources. Another confirmation were two songs that I listened to that really spoke to me by the Superchicks. One was Beauty from Pain which reminded me of Romans 8:28, the verse that I have been living by these past few weeks- that God will bring good from everything for those who love Him. The other was Stand in the Rain and it talks about standing firm through the hard times- Stand in the rain, Stand your ground, Stand up when it’s all crashing down. To me this confirmed what God had been saying about not letting go of all that I had learned this year, to stand my ground and hold onto it.
So overall the theme of the day was trust. However, another thing that He had told me was really unsettled in me, and I wanted to dive into it more. I wanted to know how to change myself to be more accepting of His love. He had said some interesting things about my ability to accept love, and so throughout the next couple of days that is the theme I stuck with. Keep reading my next blog to see what happened.
