I Am Smiling

This month in the Philippines was, to say the least, phenomenal. I am learning and have learned so much already with almost no time to process. Throughout this month, I have been so encouraged of God and His real faithfulness. My team and I have been so blessed by everything around us and the people here. The one thing that has been difficult for me is seeing all of the poverty that exists here.

I spent a day apart from my team last week, and was inspired by that long, lonely time. I hung around with one of the ICM workers named Mom Grace, which was good because she has such a mom’s heart and care. After helping with the feeding program and cooking a meal with three Filipino women while listening to the chat in Cebuano, Mom Grace and I decided to go on some home to home visits.

The neighborhood that we ventured into was dry, dusty, and poor. When I go into places like this, I cannot help but wonder how these precious people are surviving. I put myself into their shoes and try to imagine living with only enough money to eat a little each day… no new clothes, no going to movies, no idle time, just the thought of surviving and sustaining my children.

One house that we visited was a very small bamboo hut with one room divided by a curtain. In this home, we found a mom and several children. I learned that this woman does her best to care for these babies with almost no resources. There were no pictures on the walls, no flooring, no pillows, no bedding, no dishes, no curtains… Looking around, I would expect to see people who are sad, lonely, depressed, and non-responsive. That visit changed my thinking.

When I first greeted the family, I was given warm handshakes and welcoming smiles, even from the children. These people were happy… My mind did not understand what my eyes were seeing. As we visited I realized that this family had nothing but each other and they were smiling. Mom Grace asked me to pray over the family (what do you even pray for in this dire situation), and then we left.

I realize that this whole trip is putting me into uncomfortable places and forcing me to see myself, and I just wanted to make it known that I am smiling. Despite what is hard emotionally, physically, relationally, or spiritually, I am still smiling. The Lord is by my side and He will never let me go. My head is high and I am moving forward.