Well this sucks!
I am exhausted!
We have to be packed and ready to go in less than 8 hours.
There is a giant light right about my tent so it's completely bright in my tent.
There are people talking loudly directly outside my tent.
I'm completely rethinking this whole thing!
What was I thinking?
I don't like camping!
I hate the rain and bugs and being in raw community with others.
I just want a normal life! One where I get married and have kids and enjoy the little comforts like sleeping inside in the AC in a comfortable bed!
I am so seriously in over my head!
What a failure am I?
I cling to a job, then fail at that.
I cling to relationships, and all of those fail!
And now I am clinging to The World Race and I am already failinlg at that!
So I give up God! I surrender!
I don't want to cling to anything aside from You! World Race or no World Race; marriage or no marriage; kids or no kds – no matter what God, it's all You!
You have to do this God! I cannot – I hate this! I am not having fun! This is not all I'd hoped it would be. I am falling apart and You alone can save me!
Come quickly Jesus!
This was my first 24 hour experience with The World Race training camp.
In that brokenness Jesus met me, and He changed my whole world! He freed me from 20+ years of garbage I had been clinging to.
He loosed chains in an instant that 3 years of counseling couldn't even touch.
Thank you for your prayers and for walking through this journey with me! I'll be giving a more detailed post about traning camp soon, including pictures and who my family for the next year will include.
Rest assure, I AM still going on the World Race! God has made it very clear that this is His will for me. Like it or not. Comfortable or not. Growing pains are very painful, but necessary.
