Identity is such a tricky thing. When we are young we are always asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” But, I can’t recall a single time when someone asked me, “Who do you want to be when you grow up?” In this culture, we are encouraged to dream about occupation, but rarely encouraged to dream about identity and character. “What kind of a man do you want to be when you grow up? What kind of woman? What kind of wife? Mother? Father? Sister? Brother? Friend?” Aren’t these more important questions than discovering occupational dreams? If we took the time to figure out who we want to be, would that not direct us towards what we want to do? Don’t get me wrong, I think that dreaming and encouraging dreaming in others is important, I believe that the Lord placed passions and desires within each of us, and dreaming of things to come is a gift that He has given every one of us. However, I think that more than that He wants us to know who we are.
David says in Psalm 139 “For He formed my inward parts, He covered me in my mother’s womb….I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from Him when I was made in the secret place, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. His eyes saw my substance being yet unformed, and in His book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them.
Such purpose, such intention. We weren’t just made; we were skillfully wrought, as an artisan plies his craft. He knew us before we were even formed, He saw us, He pictured us, and He had a plan for us before we ever came into existence. And while I think that God cheers us on as we dream and do the things that we are passionate about, even more than that He cheers on the discovery of who we are and who’s we are. It does not matter what we do, if we are dishwashers, actors, or business people, because He doesn’t love what we do, He loves who we are, at the deepest core of us.
My husband and are talking about trying to have a baby this year, and while it is a dream of ours to have children, and we are very excited, it is also a little scary. It has forced me reflect on how great a privilege it is to have children, but also how great a responsibility it is. We need to feed, clothe, love, and care for these lives. I consider the weightiness of that. More than anything I want my children to grow up knowing who they are, to know that they are loved, cherished, and cared for, no matter what they do. I think that is how God feels about each one of us, He desires to see us walking in the fullness of who we are.
I need to remind myself that it isn’t important what my child does, or what I do for that matter, what is important is who we are, and who we are becoming.
