I’m currently in Cambodia, lying on the floor on top of my deflated air mattress contemplating how I am going to start this blog. I want to share what the Lord is walking me through, and what He’s been teaching me of late, which is trust. That’s a big word. TRUST. Clearly not in the context of how many letters it contains, but more what the word stands for.
The free dictionary online defines trust as follows:
trust (trust)
n.
1. Firm reliance on the integrity, ability, or character of a person or thing.
2. Custody; care.
3. Something committed into the care of another; charge.
4. The condition and resulting obligation of having confidence placed in one
5. Reliance on something in the future; hope.
v. trust·ed, trust·ing, trusts
v.intr.
1. To have or place reliance; depend
2. To be confident; hope.
1. To have or place confidence in; depend on.
2. To expect with assurance; assume
3. To believe
4. To place in the care of another; entrust.
There are things that I implicitly trust in the Lord for. There is no doubt in my mind that He will always come through, and take care of these things. I lean on Him. Finances and provision is one example, There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that He is going to provide for me everything that I need exactly when I need it. If I need money I give it to God, if I need a roof over my head I give it to God, if I need food I give it to God. I know in my heart that my God will never leave me in lack. After all, I am a daughter of the most high God, and Father’s take care of their children. I verbally declare abundance over my life on a daily basis, and I truly trust that I live in it and receive it from Him.
Mark 11:22-24
“Have faith in God,” Jesus answered. “Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
And this is what I do.This is how I live my life………….in some areas. And then there are the other areas, the areas that I for some reason have doubts about. Places in my life and heart where I hold back from God because I don’t know if I can trust Him with them. Things that are so close to me that I am scared to give them to Him for fear that He won’t come through, and that He will in some way fail to meet my expectations.
Ephesians 3:20
Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us
EXCEEDING ABUNDANTLY!
I am reading through the gospels because I want a better understanding of who Jesus is and His heart. Right now I am reading Mark, and it is through this book that He is showing me a lot about what my trust looks like. In Mark 6:30-44 He feeds five thousand with 5 loaves and 2 fishes…and that is only counting the men. He feeds them til they are full, and…they have left overs! Right after this, he makes his disciples get in a boat and set sail, and He goes off to pray and commune with the Father. At about midnight, in the wind and storm, He decides to go and see how His disciples are doing in the middle of the sea, so He saunters out there, no big deal….just the Son of God walking on water. The sea is rough, and when the disciples see Him they are afraid. Jesus says, “Be of good cheer, It is I, Do not be afraid.” And then it goes on to say in verses 51- 52. And He went up into the boat to them, and the wind ceased. And they were greatly amazed in themselves beyond measure, and marveled. For they had not understood about the loaves, because their heart was hardened.
Our hearts become hardened when we consider anything other than God and His ways. In this case, the disciples minds was totally consumed with the storm and how they could save their own skins. However, they were considering only the natural ways of deliverance. They should have been considering a miraculous deliverance since they were out on the sea in obedience to Jesus’ command.
If they had kept their thinking stayed on the miracle they had just seen Jesus perform, then they wouldn’t have been amazed to see Jesus walking on the water toward them. Certainly, a man who could feed five thousand men (not including women and children) with five loaves and two fish and have more left over when He finished than when He started could walk on water too.
And that’s where my trust comes in. Why do I trust Him for my loaves and fishes, but not for other things? After all He is God, He is faithful, ALL OF THE TIME! He has never done anything to let me down before, in fact, He has proven His faithfulness to me time and again! So why the doubt? I think that we take experiences from life, hurts that we have experienced from people in our past, and who am I kidding, our present too, and we project them onto God. I have been hurt before in certain areas in my life, and because of these hurts I have put up walls to keep people out, and in turn keep the possible hurt out. But in the process I have also kept God out. I don’t trust people with my heart, and therefore, don’t trust God.
So, that’s where I’m at. Learning how to break down walls and trust God in every area in my life.
Matthew 6:33
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Psalms 37: 1-7
Do not fret because of evildoers,
Nor be envious of the workers of iniquity.
For they shall soon be cut down like the grass,
And wither as the green herb.
Trust in the Lord, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the Lord,
Trust also in Him,
And He shall bring it to pass.
He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
And your justice as the noonday.
Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him…
