There have been many times throughout the race when I think about coming home. Not because I am in a rush to get home, but because I want to be able to share what God has done during this experience with my friends and family. I want them to see what God has done in my life…and see the power of his love when you allow it to move in your life.
I want them to be touched by God…whether they have been or not…because He wants to do it…again and again. I want them to believe that God has something bigger and better for them in their lives…and I want to walk alongside them…through the pain and the joy…as they let go of the world and seek out OUR Father with all of their heart.
God is so amazing…I don’t have words…God move in our hearts…
So when I think about what it would be like to go home…every time I picture myself getting overwhelmed with people asking me to tell them about this trip.
And honestly, I feel kind of bad because I should have so much to say about the most amazing, life-changing year of my life…but I don’t even know where to begin.
There are no words to sum it up into a 4 hour conversation much less than a 15 minutes conversation.
I honestly can’t begin to put it into words…
But I still think about it…because I am going to have to try to explain it…
What I tell other racers is something that is so simple, but so complex…I say things like…
GOD IS AMAZING…
GOD IS REAL…
GOD IS BIG…
and…
GOD LOVES ME…
MORE THAN ANYTHING…
And it usually gets me a look like they are surprised that I don’t know that already, followed by a comment that confirms the look.
And I do understand where that comes from…I can see why people would think that I should already know that…I can see why people might think it would be a requirement to know this before a trip like The World Race…
And the truth is…I thought I did know…
I have heard it a thousand times…
We talk about it in church…
I read it in the Bible…
One of the most popular verses says this…John 3:16–For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
In my head, I have “understood” it…
God loves me…believe it…good to go…
That is what was in my head…
But I am learning…everyday…that I didn’t have a clue what that meant…
In fact, I am learning more and more everyday that I really don’t have a clue about anything…
I just know that SOMETHING is going on…
SOMETHING is going on all around me…
SOMETHING has captured my heart…
SOMETHING consumes my thoughts…
I can’t get SOMETHING out of my mind…
No matter where I look…I see SOMETHING…
I see SOMETHING in people’s eyes and smiles…
I hear SOMETHING in people’s voices…strangely crying out for SOMETHING…
SOMETHING amazing…
SOMETHING real…
SOMETHING big…
SOMETHING I can’t explain…
SOMETHING that doesn’t make any sense to me…
I am learning that that SOMETHING is MY God…
The God I have experienced this year…
The God that I have finally allowed to move from my head to the depths of my heart…
The God I want you to know…
The God I want you to trust…
The God I want you to come to in all situations…
And right now I have tears in my eyes…
Because I know that I can never bring you here…to this place where I am…
I can tell you everything…but my words can’t bring you here…
I can do everything…but my actions can’t bring you here…
So I hope…
And I pray…
that when I get home…
you see SOMETHING…
SOMETHING in me…
SOMETHING different…
SOMETHING that doesn’t make any sense…
SOMETHING you want and desire in your own life…
SOMETHING that will completely transform you…
I pray that you would let SOMETHING in…
and let SOMETHING touch you…
I pray that you would take a step of faith and say yes to SOMETHING…
SOMETHING you WILL NEVER understand…
But SOMETHING you will never regret…
God…we are so desperate for you and need you more than we will ever know…
God…please do SOMETHING…
God…all I have is words…and I know that words are not enough…God I ask that you would come now and speak to us in a way that my words will never be able to…speak to our hearts…God…sometimes we think we know SOMETHING…we think that since we go to church…work at a church…call ourselves Christian…have been Christian our whole lives…listen to Christian music…wear the Christian t-shirt…go to Christian conferences…read Christian books…or any combination of these things…we think we know…we think we have figured it out…we think we actually know SOMETHING…but we really don’t have a clue…God speak to us now…please…move in our hearts…show us that there is SOMETHING more…You are bigger that we can ever understand…You are more real than we will ever know…You love us more that we will ever imagine…I don’t understand it…You are a mystery…such an amazing mystery…such a beautiful mystery…God I want more of this mystery…I want to be part of it…I want everyone to be part of this amazing mystery…but I can’t bring them there…I can’t get them there…but I know You can…I know You can touch people and transform them…God be God…reveal Yourself to us…open our eyes to see You…open our ears to hear Your voice…open our hearts…God have mercy on us…Forgive us for trying to limit You to what we think we know…help us to let go of that image of a God much smaller than You are…break the boxes we put You in…show us how big You really are…show us how real You really are…pour Your love, your unconditional, nonsensical love onto us…transform us…transform our hearts and lives…God don’t let us settle…give us a burning desire, a hunger and thirst for You that drives us to seek You…God be our God…never let us settle…help us to always continue to seek You and want more of You…and expect more of You…I pray that we would expect You to move in our lives…and that we would expect You to come into our hearts and lives and completely transform them…God help us to let go…and to let You come in and take over…consume us…God I ask that you would continue to transform me…God I don’t want people to see me when they look at me…I want them to see SOMETHING different…SOMETHING they can’t explain…and I want them to seek that…I want them to come after SOMETHING with their whole heart and lives…God use me…transform me…I want to be SOMETHING that you use for SOMETHING…SOMETHING amazing…SOMETHING real…SOMETHING big.
