I can't believe how much spiritual and emotional growth I have had since deciding to stat on this journey. I can not wait to go out to the nations and serve God. I want to help people and love them and show them how great and wonderful life with God is. I also can't believe how many tears I have shed. Tears for the people that I will get to serve. Tears for the fear that I feel. Tears for what I'm going to miss. Tears for what I will get to do. Tears for how good God is. Tears for support that is coming in. Tears for not having enough financial support. Tears wishing my mom was here to share in this journey. Tears fearing that I won't make it. Tears knowing that this is what I want more than anything. TEARS TEARS TEARS and more tears…..It's strange to me to shed so many tears I used to be emotionally void… I cut myself off from the world and pretended it didn't affect me but getting my master's degree in counseling and having an amazing adopted mum changed all that and some pretty sweet friends to help peel away the layers I hid beneath. I learned to have emotions again and to truly be alive. It feels amazing and I know that the tears are being wiped away by God and that he sheds tears for me as well… He loves me and has destined me to go on the World Race. He wants me to serve him, to go to the nations and share his word…. The desire of my heart is just that when I talk about the race my eyes shine with a light that is blinding and my heart sings and is happy. I know this is my purpose and calling.. The tears are just part of the process and the struggles will grow me and mold me into a stronger person that shines through the darkness to serve God in all I do and all I am. I had a pastor tell me that I was just getting people to pay for this as a vacation…. This is not a vacation yes I get to go to other countries but I am serving God and working and helping others. I know that God is in this more than I have ever been sure of anything in my life. I still have $13,000 to raise but I beleive that it will come… God knows where each dollar is for my support and will provide it on his time… I have faith… I know that there will be so many more tears coming as I start to say Goodbye and prepare to leave. Tears are part of the process but they bring growth, change and healing. I'll take the tears on earth because in heaven it will be full of laughter and pure joy. Please consider helping me serve God and further his kingdom. Click on the support me button to the left or contact me to mail a check to AIM directly. Many thanks and blessings to you and realize that the tears are a good thing!!!
