Moving makes me want to cry and rip my hair out at the same time, but it’s part of new seasons of life. I moved into my parents’ house about one month ago. I stuffed all of my belongings into my room and genuinely refused to unpack for a month. I refused to settle in. I did not want to wait these next seven months before I launch for the World Race. I didn’t want to accept that I left my friends and my church back in Aggieland. I was bitter and pacing around this room that I did not want to call mine.
I write to y’all today in an unpacked room with an unpacked mind. Sorting through my stuff gave me a lot of time to think and pray about why I felt so unsettled here. I saw this room as a waiting room. I envisioned myself sitting alone in this house and counting the days until I get to live in community again. I pictured myself driving around Frisco, Texas and realizing that there is nothing exciting or new here. I could see the cloud of all of my past sins and habits drawing closer, like it does every time I am in my hometown. I was scared of waiting here. The truth is, I live a lot of my life in waiting rooms and I think you do too. We are constantly waiting for the next season of life.
“I will be so happy once I get to…” I catch myself saying this all the time, so there is no shame. Whether you are waiting on the next adventure, an engagement, marriage, family, job opportunity, fill in the blank. We come from a culture that is trained to climb for greatness, but doesn’t sit and enjoy the summit of the mountain. We immediately search for the next one to climb. We are never satisfied with where we are in life.
I will be so happy once I get to the World Race. Yes, I really think I will be happy, but why can’t I be happy now? Why can’t I be content with having dinner with my parents every night? Why can’t I enjoy this gift that my God (and my parents, shout out to y’all) have given me?
I can be happy in this waiting room. I can use this time that I was given to prepare for the season ahead. I can dive into the Word. I can savor this time with my mom and dad. I can jump further into my newfound relationship with my sister. I can use this time to glorify my God and be satisfied in the waiting. You can too, but this only happens as a result of running towards Jesus.
Jesus shows us this in His encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well, John 4:1-26.
“Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again.The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.” John 4:13-15
In this passage, Jesus is explaining to this woman that nothing will satisfy her except for Him. She desires His living water, but does not understand the significance of who is offering it. Jesus shows her that she is known in this moment. He knows that she has had five husbands. She is starting to understand that this man in front of her is special, calling Him a prophet. Take a look at how Jesus handles the situation:
“ You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming (he who is called Christ). When he comes, he will tell us all things.” Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am he.” John 4:22-26
Jesus reveals himself in this passage. He tells her that we worship what we know, truth. Now is the time to rise up and worship this God that we know in spirit and truth, but she questions again. Here is this guy telling her how to find satisfaction and salvation, but she says, “I may not know what I worship, but I do know eventually the Messiah will come and he will tell me what I need to know.” Agreeing with her, Jesus reveals himself.
Tonight, I sit here as the Samaritan woman, unsatisfied with where I am and seeking something that will finally quench my thirst. I am sitting here humbled by the presence of Jesus in this waiting room, realizing I have been chasing after all of the wrong things. Tonight, I will again drink from the living water and use my time to seek after the only one that satisfies my soul, only Jesus.
Challenge: Go listen to “You’re The Only One” by Chris Renzema to worship and pray over this topic of satisfaction. Are you satisfied with where you are?
UPDATES:
- There has been a route change! I am now going to Myanmar instead of Laos. This is not a sad thing. I have a feeling that Myanmar is going to be a really sweet month with Jesus.
- I am currently working as a nanny in Plano for the summer. My paychecks are going towards the Race and I feel blessed to be able to invest in my own journey! I am working so hard to be able to go to the nations, but I still need help.
- I am currently seeking MONTHLY DONORS. If you love sending people to proclaim Truth to the nations and are financially able to do so, I would love to connect with you. I am seeking a team of 20 people to give monthly at a rate of $25, $50, or $100. Please pray about this opportunity to invest in the kingdom. Feel free to contact me via social media or email at [email protected].
- My squad is growing! We have a group message going and it has been so encouraging to get to know them. We are already leaning on one another in prayer and encouragement. This is such a sweet glimpse of what community will look like on the Race. Please pray for them as they raise support and prepare in their waiting rooms!
