I’m one of those people who is constantly asking God for a sign. Sometimes it’s “Please have (insert name here) talk to me” or “mention” something related to the situation. At other times it’s just asking for a simple, “Just make it obvious if I am suppose to (insert choice).” Sometimes I doubt if this actually works, but I have come to realize that I may doubt because God chooses the option I don’t want to accept. I won’t get that message I was hoping for or anything that resembles a sign, and maybe God is just testing my patience, I may never know. One thing I do know is sometimes he really does send those signs you have asked for, and the World Race is proof of that.
I’ve been getting emails from World Race ever since I applied last spring and backed out, but I never felt the pull, would it be awesome? Of course, but I did not have the pull to go. I’ve experienced God’s pull once before when I applied to work at Covenant Heights Camp for a second summer. I felt that I needed to go, weather it was to touch the lives of summer campers or to grow as an individual, I’m not sure, but after my second summer at perhaps one of my favorite places, I did not feel a pull to go a third summer. So, when I would get emails from World race, I would just delete them..
It wasn’t until I was driving home to visit my little brother, who spent his night in the hospital, that World Race popped into my head and into my heart. It seems strange that of all times, it is when I take off of work to spend it with family, that it comes to my mind. So, I decided to wait a day or two and just think it over. I watched some videos, read some blogs, looked at the current routes and found the passion starting for me to go. I was nervous about applying because last time I paid the application fee, and was not able to get the money back because of a no-refund policy, but alas God was on top of things and sent me a sign. At the bottom of their website there was a section talking about March Madness, and I quickly learned that they were waving the application fee for this month! I felt so much more comfortable applying after knowing I wouldn’t have to pay. And application complete. That simple, the next step would be a phone interview and references, which wouldn’t take place until the next week. I took this as a time to ask God for more signs, because I still had doubt. I first asked for certain people to message me about the trip and to be super encouraging about how I should take this opportunity, low and behold, just that happend! I was blown away. But again my mind thought, maybe that was just a coincidence, So I asked for another sign, any sign, before I knew it all these little signs began to appear, but alas doubt was still there. Then, as I was visiting a friend, I was invited to Bible Study, I walked in expecting some chill Jesus time, I wasn’t expecting a sign. We were discussing Ephesians 2:1-10 (NIV) the moment I received the paper I began to read, curious as to what we would be discussing today, it wasn’t until I hit verse 10 that I halted
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God has prepared in advance for us to do.”
It hit me, my heart began to race as the World Race Flooded my mind. I wanted to shake my head and laugh, to pace the room, or even take a short sprint around the block. I like to say that God has a great sense of humor, based off of how my life has played out these past couple of years, and in this moment I just wanted to yell “Wow you did it again.”preparing my path for this trip!? Did I read that right? It felt right to my heart. I sat quietly holding in the rush of energy I had received from just reading a single line. My heart felt full, and I felt as if I was in a place of peace and reassurance. That being said, I still had to have my interview. On that day, I was asked questions about my community, about my walk with God, my family, and of course Why I wanted to go. I did my best answering each question, but thinking to myself how do I tell them God wants me to go!? I decided that it would work out, because if God truly wants me to go, then I will go, if not, I will continue my life here.
The signs soon began to appear even when I did not ask. Sometimes through my family or friends, and sometimes through the Homily at church. At times I was determined that I was just imagining it, but with each day closer drawing me closer to the trip, I am beginning to feel more confident. I have wonderful people in my life that support me in way I could have never imagined, and though it will be hard to go a year without seeing or hanging out with family and close friends, My doubt is slowly slipping away.
That being said, just because things do not seem to be going your way, does not mean that it never will. Have faith, believe, pray, find patience. God has your back, and one day if not already will give you that moment where you have a huge silly grin on your face looking to the sky, shaking your head, and saying “Really”. Because you realized that you were wrong and he was right and that his timing is always on track.
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