“You always get the best, the exact thing you need and you don’t have to work for it.”
These words were sent my way today. These words stick hard with me as a face my days.
The struggle is real. I wish we could have had this conversation as I attempt to convince myself that facing my reality is something I am going to do today and dang, just get out of bed so you’re not late. Yes, as nice as sleeping sounds, you have responsibilites. The struggle to stay present in this season is incredibly frustrating sometimes. Thirty six hour shifts on the ambulance, studying for classes, and the struggle of life in school full time, working full time, and preparing for the race has been barely keeping my head on straight most days. I’m just thankful it remains attached, and I have people who help me out when I forget my shirt I need for clinicals. The people around me are the reason I haven’t totally lost my mind yet.
Don’t get me wrong: I have an incredible life, and incredible opportunities that have come my way. But those opportunities haven’t come without a cost. The amount of nights I spent crying myself to sleep because I felt so alone in the world are more than I care to admit. The times that I spent begging God for an opportunity to come my way while I laid in a borrowed bed, on a place that I couldn’t call my own was. Y reality for a really long time. I have never been homeless, and I praise God for that. But my life hasn’t been without struggle. My days haven’t come without a cost.
I spend hours studying to be a decent student. I stay up late because I don’t have clean laundry. My room desperately needs to be vacuumed. My to-do list grows seemingly by the minute. And if you would ask the people who I have the incredible privilege of sharing a home with would tell you that my room is still a disaster post-training camp.
I don’t get what I have been given because I work hard, but because God graces me with a grace I don’t deserve. This story is about His grace, and the divine hand He shows so clearly in my life. I have an incredible place to live, friends who have become family, a job I love, the chance to finish school for my dream job, and an INCREDIBLE opportunity to go on the World Race this year. I love my life, but I’m blessed to see God’s hand so clearly in my life in this season. A comment that a short time ago would have caused me more stress instead became a clear picture of just how blessed I am.
Until it ends,
Kristy
P.S. There are training camp blogs coming. God is so good, ya’ll.
Sent from my iPad
