One thing that I am convicted of this month is the fact that my life is not as glamorous as you may think. Lets face it the word “missionary” is somewhat of a glamorous word – in the sense that you are abandoning everything for the sake of Christ. In the Christian bubble – It is like a celebrity to us. We think, or at least I did, that God must be more proud of how they are living their life. They seem to be doing something more for His Kingdom. What if I told you my life this month was not much different from yours? I had Starbucks on multiple occasions, an ice cream cone from McDonald’s practically every day, and watched a ton of movies, including New Moon (yes, I’ll admit it). If it was just this one thing that I have learned so far – it would be that God is teaching me overseas how to be more intentional with my life back home. He had to completely take me out of the world I was in, to show me how to live according to His will.

I hesitated writing a blog this month, because I feared that I had the wrong motive giving  myself the glory for what God has done. I was starting to think of my conversations with people as making “great blogs.” I almost felt compelled to prove to you that I am doing something for His Kingdom, but God showed me so much more….

The Lord convicted me of this: What if I didn’t see one person be healed or see one person come to know Him. Would I be satisfied? Would this journey be worth it? Sometimes we are the sowers. Sometimes we will never see how God used us in a situation. But maybe that is so that we don’t become prideful or take the glory away from Him.

For His Glory alone:

So this month in Turkey, I came with an agenda. My agenda was to meet this people group we were assigned to and get the questions answered that our contact gave us. Its funny how God doesn’t work according to our agendas. We didn’t find this people group and we didn’t get the questions answered. God wanted to teach me about this culture, and to learn about their beliefs. He didn’t want me to try and prove them wrong. He just wanted me to love, to listen to His leading and to obey His words. It was a frustrating time because I felt like a failure some days when we talked to none of the locals. I thought at times is this worth it? Am I even making a difference here? These thoughts are how Satan attacked me. When I was willing to obey, that is when God led us to a muslim woman that owned a mini-mart. We talked with her, laughed with her, and eventually we gave her a bible, which she had never seen! I don’t know what will happen to her, but all God calls me to do is obey.