The doorbell rang and my heart skipped a beat. I knew exactly what this meant, but it seemed like it came all too soon.
I hesitated… Took a deep breath… And started walking towards the door…
Since the beginning of February, there had been a wrestling in my spirit— to stay or to go?
After being in Guatemala for a year, I had been seeking the Lord for guidance of whether to commit longer in Guatemala or to head back to the States to start something new.
I spent hours in prayer. I sought counsel. I verbally processed.
And then I waited…
I spent more hours in prayer. I sought more counsel. I processed more.
And then I heard the Father say, “You are released.”
I was relieved to have an answer, but that answer came with a million more questions and emotions.
Excitement. Fear. Peace. Joy. Anxiety. Hope. Worry.
The weeks to follow, I did everything I could to soak up my last moments in Guatemala.
I spent hours in the city of Anitgua— admiring the vibrant colors that fill the streets, laughing and crying with my new friends, and filling my tummy with all kinds of delicious typico food.
I took in every moment possible in the backyard- working on my tan, playing with our pup, Misha, and delighting in his breathing-taking creation.
Each day passed all too quickly.
When it came time to say good-bye, I walked to the “prayer chair” with my head down. I was already a HOT MESS so looking at my teammates would just make the tears multiply as they streamed down my cheeks.
One by one, each team member surrounded me and placed their hands on me. Their gentle touch warmed my soul as they began to pray blessings, prophesy, and encourage me.
When the prayer was over, I looked up and saw tear-filled eyes all around.
(my Guat family)
The next moment came in reverse. Instead of me walking to the dull gray van with my bags, I walked the team outside and helped them load their bags. With all the strength I had left, I mustarded up a smile and a few hugs and said good-bye. Everyone but Noe, Misha (our rambunctious dog), and I quickly piled into the van and the doors slammed shut.
Before I knew it, there was a trail of dust as the van sped towards the lake.
The next 24 hours were bitter sweet. I spent several hours by myself reflecting, processing, and giving thanks to the Lord for the last 13 months. I spent the evening walking down memory lane with Noe on a beautiful mountaintop overlooking Anitgua.
At 9:00 the next morning, I threw some last minute things in my bag, and then heard the doorbell sing…
Our close friend, Oscar, was waiting on the other side of the door. He loaded my bags in the van, as I took one last look at the house, which I had called home for the last year.
I climbed in the front seat. Unlike any other trip with Oscar, silence filled the van. I stared at the rearview mirror as Casa Numero 7 got farther and farther away.
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It’s been a couple of weeks since I returned to the land with consistent electricity and good ole sweet tea.
There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about my friends and family back in Guatemala. Those people, memories, and experiences are written with a permanent marker on my heart.
I’m grateful for my journey this far, and I’m eager to see all the Lord has in store for my future.
As of now, I don’t have any definite plans, but I trust the Lord has each day in His hands. As I patiently wait, I will be leading some short-term trips this summer.
I want to say a special thanks to all those that have been part of my journey— for the encouraging emails that came at exactly the right time, for the prayers that gave me the strength to get through another day, and for the phones calls/ texts that gave my heart a piece of home just when I when I needed it.
