I’ve been in Honduras now for 3 weeks and I can’t figure out why I’ve had such a hard time writing a blog. Every few days, I tell myself, “Today I should make time to write a blog,” but it hasn’t happened until now. Maybe, I’m afraid I won’t be able to capture this place accurately through my words. Maybe, I’d rather be spending time with the boys who live here or some of my squad mates. For whatever reason every time I open a word document, I haven’t been able to find the words.
The minute I got to Honduras I knew it was going to be a good month. I felt it. Then I got to Zion’s Gate and met Tony and about his heart for this place. I heard the stories of the street boys who Tony now calls family. I met the boys and girls. I dug in the dirt. I ate the food. I went to Heart of Christ Ministry where Gracie told us story after story of women and children being hurt. My heart broke into a million pieces. In the past 3 weeks, I’ve fallen in love with yet another country and another ministry. This place seems different though. I fit here. I have such joy in this place. I wake up excited to see what God has for the day. I start each day early and stay up as long as my exhausted body will let me to get every last second I can with these people.
Sleeping in a tent doesn’t bother me. Cold showers don’t bother me. Digging dirt for hours is actually enjoyable. Being on the same property and serving with all 50 of my squad mates has been so good. I DON’T want to leave in a week. I don’t want to think about not seeing Ariel and Amalia everyday. I’m going to miss learning Spanish from them. I’m going to miss Noemi. I’m going to miss time on the prayer wall, Honduran sunsets, swinging on the swing, playing with the babies at Gracie’s, giving Erica high fives, and hugs and kisses from my boys.
Yesterday, I celebrated my 26th birthday. If you had told me a couple years ago that I’d be celebrating my 26th birthday in Honduras, I would have thought you were crazy. It was the best birthday I’ve ever had. God showed me how much He loved me through those around me. He gave me time to rest, time to dance on a blanket with my friends, time with my team at Chili’s, and Internet to call home. God put people around me to spoil me, surprise me, and embarrass me. Ariel and Amalia surprised me with the Honduras soccer jersey I’ve been talking about for weeks. I spent the last few hours of my birthday looking through the bible with Ariel. It took everything in me to hold back the tears of joy I was feeling from such a great day. And then, Ariel said “You NEED to come back.” I was completely humbled that God loves me THIS much.
Another country has claimed a big place in my heart. Yes, this blog is ALL over the place. It gives you a little look at my heart right now. I’m learning to live a life of gratitude so I am so grateful for all of this. I’m thankful for the pain and the joy. I’m grateful for the confusion and clarity all at the same time. I will be back here even if just to visit.
