Wasn’t I Supposed to Save the World?

I look back at the Kristen that started the Race back in January and wonder if I’ll still that girl.  I remember how I almost had a breakdown while trying to figure out how to pack my bag and still take all the “oh so important” things with me without exceeding 50lbs (don’t even bother future WRers. Believe me, no matter how long or how hard you try to be prepared, you won’t be.  Just go with it.  But you and I both know you will try anyways. Good luck).  I remember having conversations about how I wanted to change the world and save orphans and rescue prostitutes.  Those are some great aspirations, and they can certainly be done when a commitment is made to a ministry or a people group around the world, but I’m not sure why I thought that this year, full of 11 short term mission trips would be a year of “saving the world”.  But to be honest, I’m glad that it wasn’t.  I was too much of a mess to help anyone else (I still am… but i can at least function in the world now after 11 months of therapy. ha).  

Do I still want to save the world? absolutely.  The race has exposed me to a world of starving children, hopeless and lost people entangled in the lies of false religion and spiritual bondage, and ministries all over the world living as Christ’s light among the darkness.  My world has been turned upside down, my faith and beliefs since I was a child have been tested and I’ve even had to let God out of the box I had placed him in, in order to have an open mind to accept things I once considered… unrealistic.  I think that is the area I’ve grown the most.  I no longer have a box around God, and my mind is open to accept anything from healing of the sick, raising the dead, to gold dust and angel feathers falling from the sky.  Sounds crazy right?  I know.  But when you know that your God is capable of anything and everything, then you have no reason to expect him to do anything less than what the Bible already tells us he does.  For the first time in my life, when someone tells me they are hurt or in pain, my immediate response is, “can I lay hands on your pain and pray for Jesus to heal you?”  And what is even more shocking is, that many times he actually does!  Does he always? No… and I don’t know why, but I do know that he does heal the sick and raise the dead, all for the purpose of bringing glory to his name and releasing the Kingdom here on earth. 

So am I the same girl?  I would say yes and no.  I am still me, with a different outlook on life, a bigger God, a bigger picture and no comfort zone.  

Just the other night we attended a prayer service where we preached and gave our testimonies.  Afterwards the Lord gave me a vision in prayer about this group of believers that I later shared to encourage them.  Then, I met a woman there- it was her first time at the prayer meeting.  She came up for prayer and the Lord told me she had a leg problem.  I dismissed it at first, but later I saw her walking down the stairs backwards and asked her what was wrong.  She said that both her knees had been operated on and she could barely walk.  That is when I knew we were supposed to pray over her.  So, Sheila and I did just that.  I asked her if I could lay hands on her knees and pray for healing.  She said yes, and so we did just that, right in the middle of the staircase on our way outside with a dozen people waiting to come down the stairs.  Normally this would have bothered me.  I would have been worried about who was around or what people thought.  But this time, it didn’t phase me.  This time I focused solely on Jesus.  After the prayer, she walked down the stairs a little faster, facing forward.  Did she jump up and down? no… not yet.  But something I do know is, sometimes the Lord heals immediately, and sometimes it takes faith and a few hours or days.  Either way, I believe she was healed, and she believed it as well.  This is a new way of life.  Well, actually there is nothing new about it.  It is the way its supposed to be.  But its new for me.  Our God is a God of healing.  The God of the bible is still the God of today, and expects us to be like the apostles of the first century church.  

A few nights ago, our team was invited over for dinner by a muslim family.  It came as a surprise, because they didn’t even know us, and weren’t even really friends with our contacts.  When they heard we were visiting from the States, they immediately went out and bought us some Malaysian snacks and make us Teh Tarik (Chai tea) and asked us to join them for dinner.  We told them we couldn’t come because we had to teach English classes until 10pm, and their response was, “Come at 10. We will have dinner ready for you then”.  We were surprised, but agreed to come.  We showed up at 10, and they had cooked an entire feast for us.  It was absolutely delicious.  The family all waited to eat until after we had eaten, and we sat and chatted and laughed and took pictures.  They were absolutely wonderful and so hospitable.  Never in my life would i have thought I would be sitting with a family of Muslims I didn’t know while enjoying food and great conversation.  Another eye opening experience in my book.  We prayed over the house of this family (secretly), and believe God already has his hand on their lives.  It is moments like this that change my outlook on life and people groups.  

We taught English to a few 18-21 year old Muslim girls, and although they had head coverings and spoke quietly, they reminded me so much of my group of girls from church back home.  They wore makeup and jewelry, took pictures with their phones and texted their friends.  They had dreams and aspirations and hopes to find true love.  We are all people… and we are all the same, regardless of what we wear or what we believe. 

But I did develop great relationships with incredible people all over the world.  I did encourage children, youth, men and women in their walk with the Lord.  I did give young girls hope that they could live their dreams.  I did plant seeds of faith and hope in the bars in Thailand.  I did leave an imprint on each of the last 11 countries… but most importantly, each person I met, each culture I experienced, left an imprint on me.  I met people from all different cultures, who spoke different languages; I ate food from all over the world and tried to learn the cultural sensitivities to go along with it.  I experienced life in the city, life in the jungle, life in the country, and life in the bush.  And something that I have found in every single place I’ve been, is that we are all children of God and we are all the same.  We all cry when we hurt, laugh when we’re happy, sing when we’re joyful.  We all are made in the image of God, and we are all seeking fullness and happiness. 

Talk to someone today that you normally wouldn’t talk to.  Encourage someone behind the counter at the grocery store or gas station.  Bring a homeless man a sandwich.  Shine a little light and share a little love.