As our India experience draws to a close, I have spent many
hours reflecting on the past month and what I have come to learn along the
way. It’s not every day that you
get the opportunity to seek God with all your heart and soul amongst a different
culture and challenging life experiences. So, my main objective this year is to grow as much and
dive as deep as possible to obtain the most out of this endeavor. I feel that my passion and longing to
reach this goal has allowed me to fully grasp the concept of full submission
before the Lord. The race isn’t
about finding myself, like I originally thought. It’s about losing myself to find Christ and become more like
him. This race is about living
out the call by taking the love of Christ around the world and giving
his people a hope and a future in him.
It is about sharing the gift he has so graciously given to each of us,
the gift that is readily available to whoever accepts it. The gift of salvation is so obtainable that many people miss it,
thinking the ease must be misunderstood, or they just aren’t good enough or
“religious enough” to receive it.
When you fully grasp the love that God has for his children and how
badly he wants each one of us to be reunited with him through his son Jesus
Christ, your life will never be the same.
It isn’t about what you have or haven’t done; it’s about realizing you
are nothing
without him and figuring out that nothing but him will satisfy the
emptiness and fill the void deep within your soul. In John 4:14,
Jesus says,
“But whoever drinks
the water I give him will never thirst.
Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water
welling up to eternal life.”
This realization hit me in 2008 when I was able to fill that
void with Jesus Christ. I once
felt incomplete, estranged and alone, but now I know what it truly means to
never go thirsty, to be fully satisfied in Christ.
I have always had a competitive edge. I played sports for years, grew up
competing in piano and flute competitions, and played various recreational
sports in college. I think that is
just my nature-to always want to get ahead, to be “#1”. I’m sure most people can relate to this
in one way or another, whether it’s to climb the corporate ladder in your
company, be in the top of your class at school, or be the best mother or father
you can be. What I’ve come to
realize in my own life, is that I have allowed my competitive disposition to
entwine with my spiritual walk with Christ. I started to find my identity in leadership and living off
my own strength rather than relying on God. I found myself competing with other teammates in my thoughts
and exemplifying it in my actions.
I knew it wasn’t right, nor was it pleasing to the Lord, but it was me,
the person I’ve always been-so the question I asked the Lord was, how do I let
go of who I am to become more like you?
I didn’t get an answer right away, nor was it a booming voice from
heaven, but the Lord began to show me through scripture and literature just how
to go about losing myself to find Him.
Philippians 2:3-11
says,
Do nothing out of
selfish ambition or vein conceit, but in humility consider others better than
yourselves. Each of you should
look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as
that of Jesus Christ. Who being in
very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in
human likeness. And being found in
appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death-even death
on a cross. Therefore, God exalted
him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that
at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under
the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of
God the Father.
For the past few days, I’ve really meditated on this
scripture. Paul (the author of
Philippians) is telling us that we are not to be obsessed with getting to the
top or pushing our way to the front, but that we should put ourselves aside and
help others get ahead. He says
that our attitudes should be the same as that of Jesus. Recently I listened to a sermon by
Pastor Steven Furtick about obtaining the peace and joy of the Lord despite
life’s disappointments and unmet expectations. By taking the lowest position and putting the needs of
others ahead of your own, you are able to receive God’s deepest peace. So I got to thinking, what does
it really mean to obtain an attitude like Jesus? John 13:1-5 tells the story of Jesus washing his disciples’
feet. In biblical times, the rabbi
or honored guest would have their feet washed by their host or by someone of
lower position, but Christ, the son of God, the King of Kings, got down and
washed his disciples’ feet. This
speaks magnitudes of the attitude and character of Jesus. He came to this earth in human form,
having all the rights and privileges of deity at his fingertips, but rather than
put himself at the highest position and taking advantage of his status, he put
himself at the lowest position and honored those beneath him.
Another scripture the Lord has placed on my heart in this
season is Romans 12:9-13, which
states,
“Love must be
sincere. Hate what is evil; cling
to what is good. Be devoted to one
another in brotherly love. Honor
one another above yourselves.
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the
Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient
in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”
One of my spiritual gifts is servanthood. Since I was a child, I have always
shown love and admiration through acts of service. Recently I sat down with my squad leader, Hollis, and talked
to her about the pros and cons of this spiritual gift. One of its potential pitfalls is a root
of frustration. Sometimes things
that I notice may go unnoticed by those around me, which can lead to feelings
of aggravation or even resentment.
I say potential pitfalls
because the manifestation of the resentment and frustration is solely up to the
servant. I have come to realize
that in order for me to use this gift to the best of my ability, I first need
to have the joy of the Lord and his deepest peace. To obtain this, I must honor others above myself and love
them the way Christ loves us. Since
training camp, I had struggled with not having a specific role, such as a
leadership or financial position, but I believe the Lord is calling me to be a
servant to my team, which is a role in of itself. I have come to realize that it is a gift that not everyone
possesses, and I can really use it to build up those around me. By serving others and putting
their needs ahead of my own, I can not only find my identity solely in Christ
and obtain an attitude that greater resembles his, but I can also build up my
team in the process.
I believe I have found freedom. Now its just up to me to live it out.
