I wanted to share some of my raw and unedited thoughts on Christmas just 34 days after arriving back home in America from a year long journey around the world.
They warned me about this moment before I left the World
Race, but without control of how I might feel in this moment….it has arrived. I
feel confused, helpless…. drastically different, like my perspective is so insanely
different from when I left and from everyone else around me. One would assume that you would be
changed after serving around the world for a year….but I never could have
imagined that God could do so much inside of me in such a short time.
I spent this Christmas in Florida with my family visiting my brother and the only grandchild of the family- my incredibly adorable niece Madison. I cherished our time together, as it had been over a year since we had been all together as a family. So it all started like this…..
One beautiful Christmas tree overflowing with gifts for my 4 year old niece… a precious and beautiful sight as she unwrapped each present with wonder and joy. There were so many presents the unwrapping went on for hours to the point where a few of us adults were starting to play with her toys to maintain focus. I picked up the game “Connect Four” and was not prepared for what God was about to do inside me……
I sat still, completely paused starring at the game, and slowly slipped back to the days spent in Thailand with the prostitutes that were being sold in the human trafficking market at the bars in downtown Phuket. The bar counters would be lined with Connect Four & Jenga games. Ironically childish, but just the distraction a woman would used to engage a person long enough to solicit themselves 
to them to be owned for a night, week, sometimes months at a time. I tried to blink harder as if that would stop the cascading wall of images that flooded my mind. Images of people we met on the World Race came rushing back…children starving, babies infected with AIDs and orphaned, adults with no hope to break the chains of their addictions, woman and children being sold and trafficked as sex slaves….
In this moment Madison had just finished opening her last present, and looks up and says “I want another one, I want more!” What was an innocent and cute moment broke my heart when i thought of all those kids around the world that don’t have anything, not even shoes. So, to harness the conflicting feelings in my heart as to not get angry or cry…I decided to shift my feelings to something positive and desired to spend some time as a family talking about the Christmas Story- and what really happened on that night our Savior was born. I didn’t want anyone to feel ashamed of having many presents or Madison to feel guilty, but I wanted to turn our hearts towards God and thank Him for blessing us in such incredible ways.
When attempting to shift some of 
our attention to God, it seemed at though no one could hear me, that everyone was far too engrossed in their new ipod, new game, or cleaning up the mess of wrapping paper and bows… So i left the room disheartened and spent time praying and thanking God for all he has done in my lifetime…and praying specifically for my family. By evening the the family had a short time to talk about the Christmas story and who Jesus was, although I was fighting feelings of it feeling forced or because of obligation to make me happy…… I kept praying……..not even 24 hrs later I find my dad asking for my bible and has been reading Matthew & Luke for hours, most likely the first time he has revisited these books in over 28 years! Wow God, you are good! When taking a close look at the Christmas story you will find that there are things we have always assumed about Jesus’ birth that has been implied by our culture, but there are many things that I failed to know until i looked a little closer…. Here are some questions that helped inspire us to look closer at our Kings birth…
* Is the birth of Jesus in all the gospels? (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) No. Just Matthew & Luke
* Were there 3 kings, and 3 wise men? Are the kings and wise men the same guys?
* Does the bible says anything about animals being present at Jesus’ birth?
* Was Jesus delivered in a stable or a manager? What is frankincense? What is Myrr?
* Was there ever an encounter with an innkeeper mentioned in the biblical story?
* What is a Heavenly Host?
I pray that during this hectic & digitally connected holiday season…. you find time to read in more detail the story of the baby who was born to save us! Today a king was born, and he is the one who has given me a heart beat and my joy! I hope you share with your family the story of Jesus’ birth and celebrate the life & many blessing that have been given to us!
I THANK GOD FOR EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU! MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Enjoy these fun videos!
