Everything is becoming so real!
When I first got accepted to be a part of the race it seemed like just a dream, a dream that I could not really wrap my mind around. These past two weeks I have been getting my support letters typed up and ready to send out, brainstorming fundraising ideas, and started pricing all the equipment I will need for my trip! Whew! It’s been overwhelming but all so exciting!
I have started to feel some sadness about leaving my family, and worry, thinking about where I am going to sleep, and what type of crazy things I will encounter, but then I make myself stop and think WHY I am doing this! For those of you that have known me for a long time, you know that for quite some time, it was obvious I hated life. I did not want anybody to talk to me, smile at me, even look in my direction. I would sit in church with a hard heart and a “I so do not want to be here” expression on my face. For those of you that do not know me, I struggled with depression for a very long time. It started when I was about 14 and it was a battle for me until I was 16-17. I ran away from home and talked to boys to feel loved/accepted. I would sleep every chance I had just so I would not feel anything anymore. But God came in, even though I was running away from Him as hard and fast as I could, He came in and just loved me.
Crazy how love can change a person so drastically. That is exactly why I want to do this race. He changed me so I could go out and show His love to the broken! Just thinking about that, man! It gets me so excited! It makes all worry leave and complete excitement take over! Who is God going to use me to touch? and where? and how!? All these questions that will only be answered as time goes on! This trip is going to be such a great experience and God is going to do such awesome things! Keep praying for me please!
“For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
