Since approximately month 2 of the race, the Lord has been teaching me how necessary it is to belong to a community of believers and to commit to that community. As I got vulnerable and asked for prayer, I found encouragement, love, and truth spouted out of my squadmates. That is community.
That moment began a process of me understanding vulnerability and also the process of understanding how a community of believers is meant to function. I thought I did what I was supposed to in community. However, I also did not fully realize that I held back much of what I felt the Lord was asking me to say, would not teach others things the Lord had taught me, would not encourage or affirm except for occasionally, and the list continued.
Now don’t hear that I think I never do anything right or that I never follow through with the Lord’s leading – that’s not nearly true. My heart and my mind were expanding though, and it meant that I began to step into things with the Lord in action and realization.
Scripture says so much about what a group of Christians together should be doing and saying, and I did not truly get most of it. I was starting to understand though.
As we transitioned out of month 3 in Cambodia to month 4 in Thailand, we had a short break in Chiang Mai at a conference called The Awakening. We came together with a few others squads and led one another in worship, prayer, evangelism, and hospitality.
Each person prayed and selected a part in one of the above things. This would highlight different passions, talents, gifts and serve to help people grow in new ways. We also had a speaker that poured into us with different messages throughout those few days.
I was hesitant about picking a group and knew I had narrowed it down to prayer and worship. I essentially began to ask myself which one makes me uncomfortable. I love prayer and often find it a safe place. I also love worship; however, I tended to back away from it. Why? It doesn’t feel safe at all – I feel exposed when leading worship like my heart is on my sleeve for every person to see and that was uncomfortable. Not to mention that certain insecurities would pop up, reminding me that I needed to surrender those things to God and to make that time and place of worship sincerely and only about the Lord!
So I made the decision and hesitantly joined the worship team. A squad mate talked about me singing, and I was officially signed up to help one morning. I stood in front of everyone, sang to Jesus, listened to Holy Spirit, and enjoyed every second of it.
Immediately after this, one of my squad mates shared some of what she has learned during her time on the Race. As she spoke, I felt overwhelmed. Yes, she sounded melodic, but that was not what caught my attention. She was doing exactly what the Lord had asked of her. She was playing her part and role in this community wholly. But not even just that, as she did that, I realized that I had also stepped into that by saying yes to help lead worship. I had given of a gift the Lord gave me, and she was doing the same. She was not supposed to sing; I was not supposed to teach. We functioned as meant to be – a true picture of the body of Christ.
First Corinthians 12 reminds us that we have gifts and that we are all part of one body. So if each person is a part of the body, then we should create a system that functions smoothly. A hand is not supposed to be or wish to be the mouth. We also need one another to fully function. We cannot say that we do not need a certain part. We need it all!
Well… when I’d often chosen to not use gifts or talents, I was essentially saying no to being my part in the body. However, when I saw the beauty of all of us functioning how God designed and found delight in it, it was like something finally clicked in a passage of Scripture that I’d read a thousand times before. My part is essential. Your part is essential. We are meant to come together and create a whole body without a single part missing.
As I’m moving forward with this information and action in life, I’m realizing more and more my role. I’m also realizing the different things that can keep me and others from functioning in our roles. My desire is that I would not step down from what I’m meant to do, that I would call out things I see in others and empower them in those, and that we’d actually come together in unity and function like a body.
From my heart to yours,
Kim
