Most days on the Race, I am in a great mood. I have energy, am excited for the day and am ready to embrace the culture. The past week, however, I was in some kind of “funk”. I didn’t feel like myself. I was homesick and started to doubt and worry about my future. I wanted so badly to get out of it, but felt like I couldn’t or didn’t know how.
Do you ever have those doubts that creep in? The enemy tries to tell you that you’re not good enough for this. You are not qualified or that you are going to regret your decision.
As I was headed to the beach, I realized that I had not been taking my personal “funk” to the Lord so I began to pray.
Jesus,
I’m nervous. How did month one become month nine? How did time fly by so quickly? The unfamiliar has become familiar. Will the familiar be unfamiliar again? Daily, I feel like I am fighting the battle of staying present but praying into what’s next. I am asking that you prepare my heart for the next season, prepare my Race family as we say goodbye to the only constant thing we have had this past year- each other, and prepare our family and friends’ hearts to receive us.
What is it going to be like going home? Not just the physical aspects of reverse culture shock, but the emotional and spiritual changes too?
Lord, I am a whole new person. How will I be received by friends? Will friendships pick up where they left off or will there be a disconnect from our different experiences from this year? Will we have grown in the same or different directions?
I have so many questions and concerns and yet you keep telling me to trust you. It’s easier said than done Jesus, but I’m working on it.
Come with me by yourself, Kimmy, to a quiet place and get some rest.
Do not fall into the easy trap of seeking your affirmation from other people. The amount of times people reached out to you this year has no indication on your friendship. Their willingness and eagerness to hear stories from the race is not a measure of friendship. What we have done together is what I care about. Love people, but press into me before others, always. I love you. Be strong. Have courage. Do not be afraid. I will always be with you. I will never leave you. Trust. Me. I got you. – Jesus
As I began to ask God to speak truth into my doubts , He reminded me of these powerful lyrics:
“Our God is for us.
He will not be over come.
For we trust in our God
And in His unfailing love.
We will not be shaken”
(From the song “We will not be Shaken” by Bethel – If you would like to listen to the song, click here)
We are warriors with the Spirit. We have armor that we can choose to put on to defeat the lies. The belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, shoes prepared to tell others the good news of Jesus, shield of faith, helmet of salvation, and the sward of the spirit. (Ephesians 6: 14-17) This armor covers the front of our bodies. The enemy will never be behind, chasing us because God is always fighting him through and despite us. We have every tool we need to defeat the enemy’s lies because we have the Holy Spirit living inside us. We are warriors and God has already won this battle for us.
Will you be shaken?
We visited a few shut ins on a prayer walk last week. These two ladies had some of the strongest faith and trust in the Lord of anyone I have met. Will you stand strong where ever God has you no matter the situation? Maybe he has you leading a new Bible study, sharing your testimony with someone at the office, or taking a more challenging class.
In whatever situation, I encourage you to stand firm. We are THE generation. We have been told in church since we were children that we were the future. I am excited to announce that the future is now! We are rebuilding, renewing, and restoring cities. We will be known among the nations. (Isaiah 61:4 and 9) Whatever you are doing next in life, whether it is applying for a new job, starting your senior year in College, beginning a family or retiring, be reminded that your fight is not against other people, but against the enemy. You are the generation to change this world for Jesus. Do it boldly through prayer and with full trust and faith in our God.
