June 23, 2017 – Day 323 on the Race
Dear Kimmy,
You are back in America now, or so I presume. You sleep in a bed, take hot showers, and eat what you want, when you want.
You came back as Kimmy but a new and improved daughter of the King. You walk in more confidence, God’s authority, and peace for the future. You look the same on the outside, but the inside has been dug up, repotted and is a new creation. You may say new vocabulary and do things a little differently, but walk in your true, authentic self, even in a culture where norms and community now seems foreign. Live the way you desired to on the Race: missionally, interruptible, always praying and motivated by love. You no longer live in fear of man, but in reverent fear of God.
Don’t forget what you have seen and experienced. Don’t take for granted your blessings because you are blessed to be a blessing.
Don’t get comfortable because in uncomfortability is where you grow; in deserts, you find God.
You have gone on this crazy journey and learned so much; more than you can ever put into words. You have learned to have a little and you have learned to have a lot. You have gone to bed stuffed and gone to bed hungry. You have been blazing hot and shivering cold. You have bathed in freezing cold water falls, slept with heated blankets, took countless bucket showers, slept on the floor, and lived with a professional chef. Through the little and big, you have learned to be content in it all.
The Race has been full of first and new norms. You have tried snail, tarantula, snake, scorpion, goat, chicken foot, durian (worst fruit ever), jack fruit, and so much more. Remember the everyday occurrence of asking eachother when the electricity or water will come back on, what “that” smell is, if someone can borrow a few pasos, and who wants to shoo the chicken out of the bedroom. You learned to pet goats more often than dogs, ration out toilet paper, keep yourself entertained for countless hours, wear the same outfit for a week, and give unmeasurable amounts of grace.
Your perception of community has changed for good. Your team has become your sisters and has taught you to not gossip but talk directly, gently, and honestly. No longer be ok with surface level friendships but always dig deeper and be authentic. You can use words to encourage and call people higher; they are powerful tools. You also learned that nothing is yours so steward all that you have generously. Above all, though, press in and love well.
I know that you will miss the good and the bad, the hard and the easy. Don’t forget the nights in Swaziland when you had to pee but the only “toilet” was a walk to the long drop. Or do you remember all the squatty potties in Asia that you constantly had splash back from? Don’t loose memory of the days when you and Mariah tried to teach English vocabulary to first graders in Thailand. The students would stare blankly until you said something familiar like”donut” or “cake” and they would then repeat it back loudly and cheer. Treasure the adventures of seeing the lion at the African Safari, having the shark swim against you in Durban, seeing the sun rise at Anchor Wat, boarding down the volcano in Nicaragua, snorkeling in Jamaica and Haiti, and zip lining through the Costa Rican rain forest. Forever be impacted by the conversations you had with locals during evangelism in Haiti. Always remember the woman who had to forgive her friend who ate her baby out of starvation, the men who gave their lives to Christ and had the biggest smiles on their faces, and witnessing Jesus rebuke an evil spirit from a lady, changing her very attitude and demeanor.
Hold on to the moments you realized that anything can be an adventure and worship is a posture of your heart. Your perspective can change any situation.
From beginning to end, you have had some amazing adventures and exciting ministry opportunities, but nothing will be as life changing as the relationship you have grown to have with Jesus. You no longer see quiet times as a chore to check off the list but as a way to glorify your Papa. You don’t do the same thing with your best friend every day so why do the same thing with your time with Jesus daily? You talk to Him like He is your best friend, lover, and father who is ever present. Spending a whole day with Him is completely satisfying. He has taught you so much: to choose joy, who your identity is in, and how faithful He is. He has shown you to pray, be bold, content, dream big, dig deeper, and live abundantly, simply, and humbly.
You know there is no turning back now. You have experienced so much of Him and want nothing besides knowing your Papa more. Even if He never reveals himself again to you though miracles or healing, I pray you will never cease seeking Him in faith to just know Him. I hope you continue to want to do things not because you are supposed to but because you are passionate about it.
From long ago, you were scared to dream. You didn’t want to have big ideas in fear of failing or not fulfill them. God told you to dream big and believe. He has instilled dreams of planting a church one day, cultivating community through hospitality, and disciplining folks through intentual care. I don’t know the details or His specific plan now, but I trust that He will reveal it to you in His perfect timing.
Last but not least, you have grown to desire to live a radical life. Live this back home, Kimmy. You don’t want a lukewarm easy life. You are all in, listening to Jesus and living it out. I don’t know what this will look like day to day, where His voice will lead, but I know that the radical life you desire is simply an obedient life. Live radically, love obediently.
But this journey is not over. This chapter is closing, but “month 12” is going to be the best season of your life. No matter where He leads you, back to Colorado, to another state or even another country, seek Him and you will never live a boring day in your life.
As cliche as it sounds, you are so in love with Jesus so go shout it from the mountain top; you know you want to. There is no shame in looking like a fool because
This is the true Kimmy.
Lots of Love,
Kimmy
PS. Always stop to say thank you.
Supporters, thank you for the opportunity of a life time. Your generosity has moved me to be more generous in so many ways.
Friends, thank you for praying through this whole year. I can’t wait to hear how God has moved in your lives and to venture on together.
And family, thank you. I can not put into words my gratitude for your support in actions and words. I am forever grateful for all you have done and how I have a new perspective on family from this year.
