Most people have something to cling to as reminder of simpler and more joyful times when the days get dark. For some it is a blanket, a drink, a song…. or a mixture of things. I have contemplated what mine could be.
It could be tea.. Every sip rushes me back to a variety of memories. Especially many hours spent in New York enjoying great discussion over a cup of tea with friends!
But no …. my security is an old pair of Mickey Mouse pajamas. As a young girl I used to sneak into my parents’ bedroom, lift the pillow, and take my mom’s beloved Mickey PJ's. They were perfectly worn, soft, smelt like my mom, and had the amazing ability to transform into my own personal fort. Playing games in bed while I was supposed to be fast asleep.
This became a tradition for me. Then as I got older and started going to summer camp my mom felt the need to slip the trusted PJ's into my suitcase. With a bit of embarrassment I would keep them under my pillow at night, never to tell anyone and surely not my mom. No way could I let her know the sentimental value! When I moved from home to the lovely all girls academy at 15 I wasn't shocked to find old Mickey in my bag. Every move following the pajamas found their way to the top of my suitcase.
They have seen many nights of tears and frustration. Some nights of surprise, forgetting they were stuffed under my pillow, only to stretch out my hand and find my old friend. While living in a house with girls in Speculator, NY I had multiple friends laugh as I strutted around in the much worn garment covered with holes! Regardless, those pajamas brought me a sense of security, a reminder, comfort when everything else seemed far away.
The past weekend while struggling with thoughts of the future, relationships, World Race, and work, I went on a hunt for Mickey. Texted my mom wondering if they were back at home. Nope… not there. So once I returned back to my place I went to my suitcase only to find them waiting right at the top. So with the old pair of pajamas I may not have had the warmest night but I had the safest night.
Is this security real? Is it false? Should I not search for comfort in an object? Questions I can't answer. I know that the the pajamas didn't help me figure out any of the dilemmas in my head. They didn't change the circumstances that I seem to be faced with. They reminded me to be a child and have moments when I am allowed to feel small. Moments when I don't have to be the girl set out to change the World and achieve the greatest. Moments when I don't feel the pressure of decisions that affect the rest of my life. Moments when I can be small and be in the arms of my mother from a distance but in the arms of my heavenly Father at all times. I want to be the world changer, to be independent, to see all nations, to pursue my dreams without reservation. Yet I desire the nights of being a girl in her fort giggling as she plays her games.
Should the Mickey Mouse pajamas go on the World Race to help spread true security and love found in Christ? To 11 different countries, collecting the smells and dirt of multiple continents?
Let me know, leave a comment, encouragement helps!
If you think so head to my World Race blog and follow the link under my picture that says Support Me!
http://kimberlyjensen.theworldrace.org/
