So I’ve taken a 10 – day break from World Race support raising. It seemed that very suddenly, the World Race was becoming a chore, a hassle, a burden ( which is never a good thing) so I took a break ( a long, hard necessary break)
Here’s what I’ve learned during my 10 day hiatus:
– I was obsessing about raising support. I was constantly worrying about it in the back of my mind that I wasn’t enjoying anything.The obsession was even shown in my support letter, as I bolded words like “you can support me financially” and literally highlighting the parts of the letter only concerning money. It was getting so bad, that I lost focus on the whole point of the race (to spread His Love and show His glory to people around the world.)
– I was comparing myself to other world racers/other support raisers for other organizations. I read a WR blog about a young woman who became fully funded for her launch date. I have a friend who raised over $4,000 in a week. A week! After reading and hearing these pieces of news, I became jealous. I didn’t want to, I tried really hard not to, but I did. Thankfully I called a friend and told her that I was jealous, and she definitely gave me some Gdly advice: “When you get jealous of others, ask Dad to bless them more and more. Dad will bless those who ask Him to bless others. ”
Tough stuff to carry out, but it’s pretty miraculous how Dad equips our hearts to come to Him and ask Him for help to do stuff like that. Thankfully Dad gave me the strength to ask Him to bless my friend, and I am SURE He has and will continue to do so.
– I was trying to make my own plans about raising support, and not asking Dad for advice and instructions. Woah, does it sting when you realize the outcomes of THAT. I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off, just getting disappointed when things didn’t work out the way I wanted them too. Thankfully I received a LOT of Grace, and now I am looking forward to Dad’s specific instructions about how I should fundraise.
– I was putting a deadline on Dad. Ok, so I’m launching in January 2014, and I’ve been asking Dad for my to be fully funded by January 15 ( my birthday) I want, so desperately, to be fully funded by my birthday, so I can be fully engaged on my tasks on the field, and be fully present. I was asking/perhaps demanding that I be fully funded, with a zeal that wasn’t coming from love, it was just coming from a dark place, a place that wanted to show others that I was fully funded. To be extremely honest, I basically just wanted to find security in being fully funded. Well, I publicly announce that I don’t want to find my security in being fully funded, I want to find my security in Him and the way HE moves and does things, and I want to rely on Him to provide.
I am so thankful I took this 10 -day break. During this break, I gave A LOT to Dad, and what He’s given me is a new sense of peace. I can’t describe it, nor do I think I want to in my own words, but I think Phil 4:7 articulates it well: “The peace of Gd, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in JC.
Before I knew of this peace, my mind was filled with a lot of “I don’t know’s” : (per example)
– I don’t know if I’ll be fully funded by Jan 15, 2014
– I don’t know where the money will come from.
– I don’t know how the money will come.
– I don’t know who will donate.
– I don’t know if my teammates will be fully funded.
but now with this Peace, this peace that surpasses ALL understanding, these “I don’t know’s” have become ” I believe’s”
– I don’t know if I’ll be fully funded by Jan 15, 2014
I believe that I will have everything provided for me by Jan 15, 2014.
– I don’t know where the money will come from.
I believe that the money will come from places (people’s hearts)
that want to give and believe in the expansion of His Kingdom.
– I don’t know how the money will come.
I believe that I don’t need to know how the money will come for it to come.
– I don’t know who will donate.
I believe that the people who donate will be blessed by Gd.
– I don’t know if my teammates will be fully funded.
I believe that my teammates will be funded because Gd has already planned it out.
Again, I am so glad I took that 10 day break. To those racers who have felt that support raising is too much at the moment, take a short break. See what Dad will do and what He’ll give you. : )
