7 things i miss about home
- my family. this is easily the first thing that comes to mind and the one i find myself missing the most often. when thinking about the race, i always expected to miss them but oh my goodness, i never thought i could miss them this big. what i wouldn’t give for a way to somehow spend one day with my parents and brothers and sisters. there will for sure be some happy tears when i get to squeeze them again.
- air conditioning. i never knew how much i loved the beautiful chill of an air conditioned living space. i’ll never ever take it for granted again.
- flavored coffee creamers. i don’t even mind only having instant coffee but i definitely miss it tasting like a snickers bar.
- structure. most months on the race, there is little to no consistent routine and things could change at any given moment. this has been a massive learning process for me, someone who thrives in a sustainable, scheduled environment. it’s been an incredible release of control and i am wayyy more ok with lack of structure than i used to be, but i’m excited to establish a middle ground with god when i get home.
- show choir. idk man, show choir and what it does in my life and the lives of others is so key to who i am. and being gone for my little brother’s senior season has me all kinds of sad.. i may or may not currently be ending my days in my tent, watching the videos of their show that my family sends me.
- driving. the time i spend in my car at home is actually some of my favorite time in the day. i sing, talk to the lord, pick up a coffee, zone out thinking. i miss that time between destinations. that time to just be. i long for the day i can do that again, provided i can remember what side of the street to stay on..
- my shower. being able to turn a knob and have hot water come out is a luxury a lot of the world doesn’t have. i will thank god every single day for that shower.
7 things i will miss about the field
- these people. my squad mates, leaders, mentors, and coaches. dang i love them. i like learning with them. i like learning from them. i like doing life with them. i love relying on the lord with them. i’ll miss them like mad.
- having 8 pieces of clothing. in a way, i actually will really miss living so simply. sometimes i miss my clothes or possessions at home but a huge part of me is really starting to love the cut and dry way the lord has me living in this season.
- lemon cookies. everywhere we’ve stayed so far has these lemon filled cookies and there’s not usually much else accessible when i get munchy.
- seeing kingdom in ways i never have.
- kids. so many kids literally anywhere and everywhere. take a walk in any direction and you’ll for sure make a new friend. a friend that loves like you’ve never seen, man. the most undignified hugs i’ve ever had.
- talking to my teammates all night long because we’re stuck in the middle of nowhere with no wifi or other entertainment. <3
- having movie nights with 15 people on a 10-inch ipad. it sounds absolutely ridiculous but these have been some of my favorite memories.
this is something i’ve been asking the lord about a lot lately. he has me in a season of really just asking him “what is homesickness to you?” i for sure miss home but i think it’s more than that. i think the fact that we always want what we don’t have is a grand picture of our hearts yearning for heaven. it’s taken me a long time to not be so hard on myself for it. it doesn’t mean you’re bad at being present. it doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful. it doesn’t mean you’re too much. it doesn’t mean you’re hard to please. it just means we were created for much greater than anything we could find on this earth. it means my home isn’t here. it means full satisfaction will come when i leave this place. it means my heart is set on eternity.
