Hey hey pal! This semester has been extremely busy for me, and in the midst of a lot of new relationships, experiences, and joy, I have been wrestling with a lack of motivation to see the opportunity in front of me for the next couple of years while I’m still in school.
When I was in Nicaragua, I felt Papa telling me that missions was going to be apart of my future, more than just a once a year experience, but something that would be fully incorporated in my life. Within this past school year, I’ve received confirmation after confirmation, but been confused with the specifics on what He wanted to use me for.
Recently, I’ve felt more clarity than ever before. I’ve struggled with wanting to do something, like be a politician, ambassador, or lawyer, but not being able to actually visualize and see myself doing it. It created a lot of confusion. After many talks with Pops, telling Him I would love a sense of security, but understanding that He will give it to me when He wants to, I began to wait. I waited, and I prayed, and I cried out to God, repeatedly, asking Him to show me what He was going to use me for, as I was going through things where I felt more emotional distress than ever before, and just wanted to find a sense of future purpose in Him.
After months of asking, and thinking, and those ideas finding a way to be rejected, He answered. I was searching for mission programs to do after college, and He answered me. I found an organization called YWAM, and they have a discipleship training school in Kona. One of their tracks within the school is through Respect the Corners, which plants crossfit boxes and uses functional fitness training to reach villages in remote areas, as well as build community through fitness in the mission field. Wow, God. It seemed like He made this specifically for me. It gets better though. I got so excited about doing this, and continued to pray to Him about it, being reminded that I needed to be patient and wait for Him to tell me when He wants me to go.
Do you ever get an idea in your head that is so good and so perfect that you know it is from God, because it just isn’t something you could ever think of? Well, that happened to me. He gently whispered to me my passions, and made it clear that He gave them to me because He wanted to use them all for His glory. He showed me that He wants me to do missions, but He wants me to focus on victims of human trafficking and women and men involved in prostitution. He told me He wants me to use my passion for different languages and fitness and fighting for justice to empower these victims in different nations through fitness, and use that as a way to do missions and spread the Good News. How cool. How perfect. How tailored to my strengths, my passion, my desires. He is just so good at showing us that when He is in control, He will provide things that we can’t even dream of.
This realization has given me more security than ever, I can picture myself actually doing this, I can picture myself being successful, and allowing God to use me for His glory, to make His name and His love known. I am just so excited. Going to Thailand and Cambodia has now fueled me with a stronger passion than I thought I could feel, because we will be getting to shine a light in the Red Light district, and I just feel so warm inside knowing that He is just so good at healing us and then allowing us to use His name to bring others the same healing. I am so in love with you, Papa.
