I love a good puzzle. I love the challenging and overwhelming feeling I get when I dump the pieces out on my coffee table. Thousands of pieces [okay, maybe slightly less] scattered all over the place; each one having a specific role in creating the image on the front of the box. I love seeing it slowly coming together. I love the freedom involved in the process. The freedom to take a break and leave it for a week and the freedom to put it together however I see fit.
Ask two people how to put a puzzle together and you'll likely get different answers. Some will say start with the edges. Others will say it doesn't matter. That's the beauty of it. It doesn't matter. The only goal in attempting a puzzle is to get the finished product. So what's it really matter how you get there?
That's a question I've been asking God a lot lately.
"How did I get here?"
How did I get to this moment where I'm a mere three weeks away from leaving everything I know and love for a year?
Honest answer?
My pieces didn't fit anymore.
The things I wanted so much to be apart of in my life weren't the things I needed. And while it still is difficult to come to terms with certain aspects, I know it's perfect.
"For still the vision awaits its appointed time" – Habakkuk 2:3
All the things I thought were right…none of them were ever really close to fitting. I just made myself think they were. I tried to justify them countless ways. None of which helped.
I think God enjoys when I realize my pieces don't fit because it means I have a chance to grow closer to him. I can learn. If I stayed as ignorant as I was at 24, I'd always be 24. Aging isn't just a process where I find a gray hair from time to time and fall asleep in my recliner earlier in the night than I used to. It's growth. It's more than the negative that I'm going to eventually die one day, it's the positive that I'm understanding I'll die, and that I live a better life because of it. That I'll look for the pieces he sets out, not the ones I find in the box.
So no worries if the pieces laying around on the coffee table don't fit the puzzle you've laid out…
…accept it; and then go revel in it. Whether that's for 11 months or 11 minutes is up to you.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths" – Proverbs 3:5-6
I want to take a second and thank every single person who has donated to help me to be able to launch in a few weeks. Your kindness, love, and generosity means the world to me. My next deadline will be coming up in March and if you'd like to partner up with me and donate, you can by clicking here! And as you exit the page at the top, know that I'll be praying for you to accept that in which God places in your life and make the most of it.
