Traveling the world is not easy. There are good days, great days, bad days and even worse days. I always joke that the WR wasn’t made for people like me. I don’t like to place myself in a box to be categorized but I can say I am an extreme introvert, meaning I don’t get my energy from people. I get it from being alone. I’m someone who values alone time and silence, something that is a rarity here. There was a moment last month where I expressed to my team that I was tired. Tired of not having that alone time, tired of feeling like I always had to “be on”, tired of not feeling rested, tired of worrying about if something I said/did was going to offend someone or if I would be offended etc etc etc.
“How do I thrive on this journey without burning out?”
Last month I woke up with Psalm 23 on my heart and it has been carrying me through ever sense.
“The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.”
Question to self, “Who am I following? Who am I looking to for approval/identity, for my needs/wants?”
I believe that offenses happen most often when we are looking to others to affirm us, to grant us our identity. To tell us that we are okay and enough. They happen when those same people let us down, when they don’t give us the attention we crave or satisfy our emotional needs. Through this verse God showed me that when I depend on people less to give me what only God can I will find myself less affected by their actions or words which will cause me to be less offended. This verse reminds me that THE LORD is my shepherd, not man and that He knows full well what I need/want when and how I need it whether it be rest, quiet time, encouragement etc.
“He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul.”
Back home if something was affecting me or I needed to get alone and process something I had that freedom to do so but on the race living in such close and constant community I learned fast that was no longer going to be the case. So I asked myself, “How does God make me lie down in green pastures and lead me beside quiet waters? How does He restore my soul in the midst of chaos? ” The first thing that came to mind was His Word. Through reading His word and thinking on it I find myself oddly rested and refueled in ways that a little extra sleep could never provide. I find myself at peace in who God says He is. (Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father.) I find the restoration for my soul when things get out of whack and I need to be reminded of who He has called me to be. (Daughter, Victorious, Beloved). His word is what gives me the strength to keep going. God says His word is alive and active and that has become so true for me. I’ve gained a deeper understanding of the power of God’s word and I’ve learned His word is the green pastures and quiet waters I desire.
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me; your rod and staff, they comfort me.”
Question to self, “What does the valley of the shadow of death mean to me today?” As you can imagine traveling around the world is such an amazing experience full of newness and exciting adventure. I would have never imagined I’d have the opportunity to board down a volcano in Nicaragua, ride an elephant in Thailand, spend Christmas on Phi Phi Islands or scale the walls of Angkor Wat in Cambodia but I did and I’m beyond thankful for it. Yet, as I mentioned before traveling the world can be hard. Not only are you away from your family and friends, learning to live with total strangers and sometimes being overwhelmed with the work God is doing in your own heart but there are times when you’ll see and hear some horrific things. Children in Nicaragua who walk the streets begging while high out of their minds from sniffing glue instead of being in school because work is more important than education. Walking through the Red Light district in the Philippines where there are over 15,000 girls sexually exploited and trafficking is simply a way of life. Being a Christian in Thailand where Buddhism reigns supreme, where it’s all about the good works one does and not about the freedom God has given in saying “by grace you have been saved.” Just believe. To Cambodia where I’ve learned about the oppression and exploitation of women and children and how in some cases children are molested as a means of pacifying them when they start crying. “God, what am I supposed to do with all of that?” “Trust in Me, keep your eyes on me.” God reminds me that even in the midst of darkness I shall not fear the evil that seems to reign. He reminds me that His rod protects me from that evil and His staff leads me out of it. Because I am filled with the Holy Spirit I truly believe that when a child of God steps into a place they bring the light of Christ. I am reminded of Psalm 139:12 “…even the darkness will not be dark to you, the night will shine like the day for darkness is as light to you.” These verses give me confidence that in the face of darkness I can trust in the God who is with me and the God who has already defeated Satan. “Victory is His.”
Quick update:
I am on a new team!!! Meet 26 Letter Redemption. I will talk about them more later 🙂
Also, I’m only $1,330 away from being FULLY FUNDED! Our final deadline is March 1. Would you be so kind and donate to my account!! 🙂
