The time is coming for my big send off! Wow… it’s so crazy to believe that I leave the U.S in less than 15 days! Man, to lay it all out there this whole summer has not been easy and I haven’t even left yet. Leading up till now there has been so many surprises, a lot of tears, fears, excitement and generally feeling like a roller coaster.
Right now leaving everything behind is more difficult than I thought it would be. Thinking of not being able to hug, comfort, or tease family and friends has been tough. Not being able to laugh with, go on spontaneous adventures, watch friends and family get engaged or married is making FOMO (fear of missing out) feel so real right now. I’ve started to say goodbye/see you later to people in Tucson and this Saturday (9/23) I will be saying “see you later” to many family and friends in my beautiful hometown, Flagstaff, AZ (if anyone will be in Flagstaff come say “hi”/”see you later” and eat some food! Just let me know and I will give you the time and address). Through it all, I am reminded of a sweet phrase that continually popped up this summer and it was,
“I will fight for you!”
This took me a while to understand and notice. In the beginning of the summer, I was stubborn as I read through God’s word. I was saying to myself and God: “I’ve heard this before”, “why is this important?”, “I can’t even say this person/place’s name”, “how will this help me in this situation”, “this is honestly so boring” (how I felt about most books I read in college), and “ugh”. After, facing my stubbornness I realized I didn’t ask the Lord What He wanted to teach me. I realized I wasn’t listening but feeding myself with discontent. I realized I was using these honest questions to complain and avoid certain situations in my life. I wasn’t open to hearing what the Lord had to say. I realized I was feeling like an Israelite. So after all these realizations I asked God and said “Okay, Lord, forgive me for being so stubborn. Please show me what you want me to learn and grow in. Open my heart and mind to hear you speak. Help me to deny the flesh. Ask me tough questions even when I don’t want to answer or face them. Bring me into more of your goodness. Speak to me, please.”
It was a simple repetitive ask that helped me face the hurdles I was going through. And through His word the Lord spoke with a soft, gentle, confident voice and said, “Kelsey, I will FIGHT for you” and was like what!? He said it again and again “Kelsey Robyn Yonnie, you are a woman worth fighting for” (LOL queue Disney’s Mulan, jk). But really this was something new for me to hear because I didn’t understand what that meant nor see how the Lord was fighting for me. Throughout the summer after hearing the Lord’s voice I continually saw how He was and is fighting for me. Even when I’m wrestling with anger, having difficulty extending love to certain people, inability to forgive, and wanting to push everything off to the side I am reminded and told with a gentle confident voice, “I will Fight for you; your heart is worth it”, “I am fighting for you to leave all your comfort and GO to these 11 countries”. “You, Kelsey are worth it and I will be by your side”. It’s so crazy to see how the Lord calls us deeper to Him and assures us everything is in his hands and tells us we are worth it.
I pray that we would be reminded that we have an almighty, powerful, loving God who is fighting for us!
– Also, I am 42.3% funded towards reaching the entire funding goal of 17,617! PTL (Praise the Lord)! Before I leave I need to be at 56% funded. So, please pray that I reach this goal! The Lord is good and I know He will provide.
