The summer is almost half over and I sit here on my bed staring at my pack over in the corner of my room along with some other miscellaneous items. As I look around my mind can’t fathom that not even a small portion of what is around me will fit in that as I tote around my life from country to country. The thing is though, I’ve never been more excited, or terrified. I’ve never felt more…right. Like right where I need to be. Doing what I need to do. The amount of encouragement I get from people has been amazing. Just when I start to doubt, God speaks through someone somehow.
Recently we’ve been reading A Culture of Honor for work (which ironically is also on our recommended reading list for all racers) and one of the chapters talks about Abraham just before his name was changed and he journeyed to the land God promised. Genesis 12: 1-3 (NLT) reads: “The Lord had said to Abram, ‘Leave your native country, your relatives, and your father’s family, and go to the land that I will show you. 2 I will make you into a great nation. I will bless you and make you famous, and you will be a blessing to others. 3 I will bless those who bless you and curse those who treat you with contempt. All the families on earth will be blessed through you.'” The book breaks it down into 4 key aspects:
1. God called Abram to leave his native country.
Well this sounds all too familiar. God made a promise to Abram, but it was up to Abram to walk it out to receive it. This means leaving all he knew, all he was comfortable with, and all “the limitations that he has come to accept as his container, security, and realm of culture and influence.” Why? because God was all he would have to fall back on. There is no “Plan B.” Here we go to what we know before we go to God. I know when I leave Plan B will pretty much not exist. No amount of training can truly prepare me for what could and probably will happen. The rules that apply here definitely do not apply where I’m going.
2. God called Abram to leave his family.
Now technically Abram did bring his family along, but the family molds us and sometimes defines us. Our last name alone can carry influence or put us in a box. God was stripping that from Abram. As for me, I don’t have that fallback or immediate counsel. The treatment, love, and comfort I get won’t be there. The interactions will be totally different because my new family will be 6 other people from around the country who all have a unique upbringing and community. No doubt we will both encourage and annoy the crap out of each other, but we have the same heart and because of that God will use us mightily.
3. God gave Abram provision.
God showed Abram the promise he had for him if he was obedient. More wealth, more descendants, more power, influence, and blessing than he could imagine, and the dude was already pretty well established! There are many times I believe God leads us to a crossroad in which we have a choice. All of which are good, but will we choose the best? We settle all too often and I am just as guilty. I love this quote by C.S. Lewis:
“It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”
This trip, this calling, is to help me truly see with spiritual eyes unhindered. What will come of it I can only imagine, but there is a deep knowing in my spirit that is like a race horse in the starting gate waiting to burst out in a frenzied excitement. I don’t know the fullness of the provision God has in store for me. I must not be ready to see it yet, but I know it’s there.
4. God changed his name.
Abram means “exalted father,” and when it was changed to Abraham it meant “father of many.” From what I understand back then a person’s name truly was more than something you call out in a crowd to find them. It was given with purpose. Revelation speaks that on the day of judgement Jesus will hand us a white stone with a new name only known to that person and him. I don’t know why but it excites me to one day find out what my new name is. People today change names as a sign of something new or life-changing like when one gets married. I’m not getting a name change, but I’m definitely getting a perspective and heart change. I am an open book for God to write in.
So again, while I lay here and glimpse at my pack and other supplies I wonder if that fleeting feeling of excitement is the same one Abraham had. Clearly what God did through him was worth stepping out in faith. I can only imagine what is in store for me, and more importantly what God does through me. Through Abraham came many nations. I just hope I’m able to have a fraction of the impact his decision made, but I won’t know until I’m standing before his throne. This crossroad moment has been laid before me and I am running down it with everything I have.
