Over the past couple months I’ve been taking a lot of trips that ranged from a few parks near my parents house, to day trips around Ohio, and my most recent excursion to Texas with a few friends. While driving I remembered how when I was younger I actually hated traveling and sometimes when I stayed at a friends house I’d get so anxious it’d make me physically sick. Yet, I still wanted to go and do things. What was once a fear, is now my greatest excitement and the only reason I’d be glad to get up super early in the morning. In college while I was studying photography I’d grab my camera, look up a cool place, and just go. It’s been a growing love affair ever since and my most precious time I spend with Jesus. Every now and then I’d even get to share it with a good friend.
Since we’ve spent a ridiculous amount of time driving its provided a great window to reflect on the past few months before we start the Fellowship. At one point I was so overcome with guilt for not journaling or reading my bible as much as I wanted I started to cry. I thought I had wasted a lot of time and battled a constant barrage of “if only” scenarios. The invite for a spontaneous trip to Texas was a welcomed relief. During this recent venture we planed to stay with some of our old squadmates and visit Palo Duro canyon which is second only to the Grand Canyon. I was elated to learn we’d not only be hiking, but riding horses. While mounted on my steed appropriately named Guinness, I was overwhelmed at the size and vivid, rich colors of the canyon. I never thought there could be so much variety of earth tones it almost seemed like the rocks were painted.
Before I whipped out my camera I took a moment to just thank the Lord in my heart for the opportunity to be there and see some of my friends again. My mind flooded with all the beautiful places I’ve explored this past year and since I’ve been home. I thought to myself, “I’m sorry I haven’t spent much time with you Jesus. I haven’t even had some good worship time,” and like a friend who seemed a bit taken aback I felt a gentle reply of “what are you talking about? We’ve taken so many great walks recently and I’ve gotten to show you some beautiful things to photograph and inspire people. You’re walking in worship and I love how you adore what’s around you and how you want to share that.” I thought back to the passage in Joshua of the Israelites walking around Jericho praising the Lord. That’s all this season has been: waiting, hoping, and trusting. I got back to my roots of worship through photography and it’s been beautiful. I’ve done more traveling this past year and a half than most will in a lifetime, and I strive to make sure I never take that for granted or get prideful. I want so much for my life to be an example of just how incredible our walk with Jesus can be, and you don’t have to go halfway around the world for it.
My heart still desires to go places to capture moments and share stories, but I’m starting to see more and more how important that is here at home. I’m totally humbled and blown away by what is around me and the people I get to know. I saw this cute wall decor of an old map printed on canvas that said “life takes you to unexpected places. Love brings you home.” What does home look like for a rolling stone? The love I not only feel, but know exists in a person’s heart for me. It points right back to God because I can see how he reaches through that person to touch my heart. I know wherever I land I’m loved and accepted, and there’s such an amazing peace that comes with that heart knowledge. Christ’s love for me brings me home when I feel stretched thin or lost.
Now that I’m getting settled in Georgia, and getting to know some of the other people I’m doing this program with, it makes me all the more exited. There is so much to learn, see, and do. I’m more excited about this than the race because now I can take all that I have gathered and start something new. I can give back. I don’t think that desire to explore will ever stop. When we chase something, what we are after is trying to get away. When we pursue, what we are after wants to be found. We don’t chase a God who runs from us, but one that excitedly awaits.
