We've all heard those stories from a speaker in church or even a friend about the day God told them to go find a girl in a black shirt and then when they went out that day, low and behold, they encountered a girl in a black shirt and shared Christ with her. As much as I've always wanted to believe in these stories, there has always been that little voice in my head saying… "Uhhhm hello? How many black shirts are floating around in the world? Don't I have 3 in my closet alone? And if you go out looking for that of course you are going to find it, right?"
Last week if you had asked me if I believed that God spoke to us I'd have said yes. But could I really believe that and still hold on to my skepticism? If I really believed that then why was I so quick to chalk things up as a coincedence?
This week at training camp we were asked to pray and ask God to give us instructions for the day. Any words or pictures He brought to our minds we were supposed to write down then go off campus and act on them. I sat down at a picnic table with my team of 6 girls and we prayed. This is the list we compiled: a street with lamp posts, potted plants & wire lights, a bridge over a small river/creek, a table with white chairs, a woman reading a book by the water, a dress with ruffles on the bottom, and "speak loudly". The last two were mine and when I said them out loud I immediately attempted to justify myself by "likeee… I don't know. Maybe someone will be hard of hearing and we'll have to speak loudly to them?"
So the 6 of us set out to follow our 'instructions'. We stopped in a small town about a half hour from camp and as we got out of the car I said a quick prayer in my head… "God, show up for me today. You know I have serious issues with doubt and I need You to show me this is real".
As we walked across a bridge I looked behind us and noticed a woman sitting at a table with white chairs reading a menu. I turned to my friend Amanda and asked if she would go back with me to talk to her. Before we went back Amanda asked me if I thought God was calling me back there. I told her that to be completely honest, I had no idea what I thought. I saw a woman reading something by a river at a table with white chairs and I had no idea what God was telling me but if I didn't go, I'd never find out. So we went.
I won' t get into this woman's whole story but I will say this much, she needed to feel God's love that day. It became apparent minutes after we sat down that she didn't hear well and we would need to speak loudly for her (I KNOW, RIGHT?) and the table we were sitting at was on the patio of a diner where the waitresses wore aprons with ruffles on the bottom (WHAT?!).
SO HERE'S THE POINT. Am I completely healed of my skepticism? No, probably not, but after this week I am ready to step off my throne of doubt. I can't go on being both a child of the King AND the Queen of Cynicism. I had to make a conscious decision to give one up and it was a pretty easy decision.
If you listen God speaks and if you ask Him to He shows up for you.
