They always warn us that at some point, we will probably hit what they call the “WorldRace Wall”.
And I officially have, at the end of Month 7, and I’ve run into it face first.
I’ve hit the point of the journey where I’m just plain tired, and the fun adventure of the WorldRace is starting to wear off. I’m wishing I could enter through the wardrobe of Narnia, and be back in the States. I’m physically tired, emotionally tired, spiritually tired, and socially tired.…if that’s even a thing. I’m tired of sleeping on concrete floors with mosquito nets draping across my body, I’m tired of eating rice and beans for every meal, I’m tired of taking ice cold showers, I’m tired of being itchy, and I’m really tired of being around the same 6 humans at all hours of the day for months and months at a time.
I started getting mad at myself, I mean this wasn’t supposed to happen to me. Of all the people, I’m the last person this would happen to. I want to be a career missionary, and I even went to Bible School! I took all the missionary classes, and took fantastic color-coated notes. I should’ve been prepared for this! But alas, I don’t think you can be totally prepared for it.
The WorldRace is amazing for many reasons. It’s one of the greatest things over ever done. I love adventure, traveling, and Jesus…which makes this trip perfect! It opens your eyes to seeing the world in a whole new way, gives you opportunities that most people only dream of getting, and pushes and stretches you toward God at a speed not many other things can.
However, there’s a certain point when every piece of your existence has been stretched, and you’re worn out. Which is where I’m at now.
Then God stretched me even more.
He made me realize that all the things that are making me feel exhausted are because they make me feel extremely uncomfortable. And just when I start being comfortable with them, I move to a new country where a new set of uncomfortable things are thrown into my lap. They’re things that I’m not used to, and they once seemed exotic and exciting….now they’re just irritating.
There’s a battle in my heart and mind between my flesh/the enemy, and God. My flesh tells me that being in America is so much better. I have a comfortable princess bed, I can eat whatever and whenever I want, I can take hot showers and actually feel clean, strange creepy bugs won’t always be on me, and for them most part if people annoy me I can choose to avoid them.
God tells me that America doesn’t have all the answers, and there are just as many problems there. He tells me that He sent me on this journey for a reason; to teach me things I couldn’t learn otherwise.
Up until now I have been able to function totally in my own strength. I do my devotions every morning, and speak about Jesus, but haven’t really understood what it means to “live in His strength”. But now I’m desperately reaching out for His strength, because I literally have none left. I want to to able to function wholeheartedly for these final 4 months, but I know I’ll be crawling through it without Him.
Now I’m choosing His strength daily. If I go even a day without choosing it, I’m back to crawling on the floor, just dragging myself through the month. And honestly, dragging the rest of my team with me.
It’s a battle. But it’s a battle that gets a little easier as the days go on, and a battle that God and I are winning together. It’s a battle that I needed to go through, in order to learn everything He wanted me learn on the WorldRace. Because honestly, there’s going to many other times in life where I can’t escape things that are uncomfortable. Not just on the WorldRace. I’m at the end of myself, and it actually feels kind of good. Sure, things will still annoy me sometimes, but now I’m excited to see what the next 4 months hold, and am excited to see how much further God is going to stretch me. I’m going to be pretty darn flexible.
Want to follow my adventure? Check out my Instagram! kellyfranke18
