I like to think that I’m good at extending grace. And sometimes, I am. Sometimes I actually stoop to come down from my mountain, look upon some poor, undeserving soul and take pity on them. Offer them something that they certainly don’t deserve out of the clear generosity of my heart. And feel mighty good about myself as I watch them slink away, so grateful to have been offered a second chance.
And technically, I guess that’s exactly what grace is. A second (or third or fifth or 200th) chance that we don’t deserve. And it is generous and we are grateful. But somehow, that doesn’t actually sound all that appealing. The words are all right. The definition is accurate. Except that kind of grace sounds dirty. And ugly. And actually not very much like grace at all.
Because I am willing to extend grace. To overlook what’s been done (or not done), to forgive slights and oversights. To write off transgressions and failures.
Just this once…
but don’t let it happen again.
It’s like I’ve got the “Go and sin no more” part down pat. But I’ve missed the “neither do I condemn you” part. Or actually, maybe it’s not that I’ve missed either part, it’s just that I’ve got them backwards. Somehow I’ve lived a variation of grace that says, “I can forgive you for this as long as you learn your lesson and change your ways and don’t ever let this happen again. I’ll give you something that you don’t deserve now, as long as you pay up later. I showed you grace, now earn it.”
Ew.
When did grace start to be contingent on repentance? I would never say, “Repent and I’ll show you grace.”
But I’m pretty sure I say, “I showed you grace, now repent” all the time. And when did I start to deserve a medal for extending grace somewhere?
Either way you slice it, Grace dependent on repentance or change or gratefulness or understanding or, well, on anything… isn’t actually grace at all.
