(Note: I do realize that this is no way close to any kind of an update to what I’ve been doing in the Dominican Republic this month. I’ve been wanting to write this blog for a while now, and this is the first opportunity I’ve had (okay, that’s a lie.). There will be a blog coming soon giving an update of what we’ve been doing. Just know that I’m alive, it’s warm and sunny, and God is working in the DR.)
This is a post about Real Men.
Last night at the dinner table, the women on my team were
contemplating the age-old question, ‘Which Disney princess are you?’1 All the classics were listed: Belle,
Jasmine, Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Pocahontas, etc.2 Then one of the girls mentioned that she
would love to someday write a dissertation on the use of Disney movies in
Christian counseling, which led to the comment, ‘That would be cool, though not
very empowering to the men.’ That got me
thinking a little bit.
Real Men. Living for
a month in the Dominican Republic has been especially eye-opening to the hearts
of boys. Boys that are led by their
flesh, by their most basic instincts, and by the easiest pleasure available to
them.
Age has nothing to do
with boys and men. Every day I walk
through the streets of Azua, Dominican Republic and find 40 and 50 year old
boys on every corner. Boys reclining on
a weekday afternoon on the sidewalk with a bottle of liquor, boys that see
women as animals (to the extent of making a ‘tss’ noise at women passing,
similar to calling a dog), boys that often get girls pregnant by the age of
twelve, or sometimes younger.
I say this not to judge them, but to tell you that God has used
the boys of the DR to reveal my (though less blatant) boyish instincts that too
often emerge and are easily exploited when God isn’t the center of my
life. It’s been a humbling revelation.
In 2008, Gianna Jessen, a Christian recording artist and
pro-life activist, spoke to me and the Queen’s Hall Parliament House in
Victoria, Australia. (Here is the video clip. And the whole speech is about 15 minutes and worth watching: Part 1 and Part 2)
“Just for a brief
moment I’d like to speak directly to the men in this room, and do something
that is never done. Men, you are made
for greatness. You are made to stand up
and be men. You are made to defend women
and children, not stand by and turn your head when you know murder is occurring
and do nothing about it. You are not
made to use women and leave us alone.
You are made to be kind and great and gracious and strong and stand for something. Because men – listen to me – I am too tired
to do your job.”
Back to Disney. As
far as Disney animated movies go, Mulan is pretty low on the list. This is due, in my opinion, to the weird,
perfectly spoken English by Chinese people and a boring villain with no
personality. But, it perfectly
illustrates the story of why poor Gianna is so tired, so we’ll go with it.
One of the taglines for the movie is, ‘This time, the
Princess saves the Prince.’ I think that
says a lot about the culture we live in today. 
Yet, our society consistently asks, ‘where are all the real men?’ In John Eldredge’s book, Wild at Heart, he has an answer:
“You asked them to be women.
The result is a gender confusion never experienced at such a wide level
in the history of the world.”
The Huns are fast-approaching with the intent of conquering
China. In the night, Mulan steals her
father’s sword and armor and sneaks off to soldier training camp. Though she’s in disguise, it’s quite obvious
that she is a young girl. But when Mulan
arrives to camp, she quickly fits in with the others, because the ‘men’ that
are to defend China are as weak as her. So
she works and fights and plays with the boys and talks and acts and thinks like
the boys.
Mulan is meant to be praised for stepping up to do a man’s
job. Really though, it was boys not
being able to do a man’s job.
The army even fends off the Huns for a time thanks to some
quick thinking by Mulan. But she’s hurt,
down, and tired of doing their job. Cue Prince Charming. When the Huns return to the Imperial Palace
and kidnap the emperor, the General of the Army steps up and defeats the Huns,
fights for Mulan, and lives happily ever after.
We aren’t living in a Disney movie.
There are too many pregnant 12-year-olds in the world. There are
too many single mothers. There are too many children that don’t know
who they are because they don’t have a father.
There are too many daughters that seek attention from boys because they
never had it growing up. There are too
many poor nations because the males sit on the sidewalk and drink all day. There are too many boys, and too few Prince
Charmings. There are too few happily
ever afters.
Before Moses parted the sea, removed his sandals and
chiseled out two stone tablets, ‘the Lord met Moses and was about to kill him.’ Though this fact was deemed
unimportant enough for the Charlton Heston version of Exodus, it seems pretty
significant to me.
Circumcision was the permanent sign of the Old Covenant with
Abraham and his male descendents. To
break God’s covenant was, well, ill-advised to say the least (e.g. any
uncircumcised male not circumcised in the flesh … shall be cut off from his
people; he has broken my covenant – Gen. 17:14). Moses had not yet circumcised
his son, and God was going to kill him for breaking his covenant. The Jews would remain slaves in Egypt and
there would never be any Commandments, because Moses wouldn’t be there to receive them.
But then Zipporah (Moses’ wife)
took a flint knife and circumcised their son, allowing Moses to live. The Israelites were saved. She threw the removed skin at Moses and said,
‘Surely you are a husband of blood to me!’
Zipporah. Was. Pissed. She had
to do Moses’ job for him because he wasn’t there to do it.
You asked them to be
women.
Gianna Jessen finished her address to the men with a challenge:
“So now is your
moment. What sort of people are you
going to be? I trust incredible. I trust, men, that you will rise to the
occasion … You are made to defend what is right and good, this fiery young girl
will stand up and say now is your moment.
What sort of man do you want to be?
A man obsessed with your own glory, or a man obsessed with the glory of
God. It’s time to take a stand.”
I want to be a man obsessed with the glory of God. Kind and great and gracious and strong and
stand. That’s why I’m here. That’s my prayer. That’s where I’m going.
1 After the conversation, the guys felt
it necessary to go slaughter a pig, climb a mountain, and play rugby in order
to regain our masculinity
2 This conversation from the girls was
hardly a surprise, as the discussion before dinner had been: ‘Where would you
have your regular home if you lived in Middle Earth, and where would your
summer home be?’ Yep, love our women.
