I walked into the hospital and the smell that filled the air overtook my lungs. All around me were people lying on the ground. To my right a man stood naked. Men, women, and children of all ages curled up on the floor. To my left a man had a small amount of gauze wrapped around his waist and blood covered him. I walked into the consult room and the hospital bed that was in front of me had a layer of blood pooled in the middle of it. As I entered the next room, a man curled up on a bed with eyes full of sadness and no hope lay gasping for breath. A baby not even two years old sat on the floor looking up at me and was unaware of what was going on around her. There was no crying, screaming, or wailing, but the pain and hopelessness seemed louder in the silence. As I looked ahead, there were trails of blood going down the hall. Bug nets hung from the ceiling in the maternity ward. bPeople smiled politely as if nothing was out of the ordinary.
Sadness and immense pain surrounded me. The people around me weren’t affected, they were carrying on with their daily lives as normal.
My heart was breaking into a million pieces.
Thoughts were racing through my head and I couldn’t process what was going on around me fast enough. This is a place that people came for answers, and we were only left with more questions. What was happening? Should I even be here? I am supposed to be the strong one here for my team mate, but am I? Are the workers here oblivious to this? Will we get out of this hospital without catching something? How do I even help? This is a hospital where people are supposed to get help, is that even happening?
All I could do was pray. Pray for hope. Pray for protection. Pray for clarity. Pray for wisdom. Pray for discernment. Pray for the people that I continued crossing paths with each step I continued to take in the hospital. Pray for answers. Pray for the kids that were curled up next to their moms. Pray for the people that were sitting in the chairs waiting for results. Pray for my team mate who wasn’t feeling well and seeking help. Pray for the anxious feelings to go away. Pray that the Lord’s presence would be made known. Pray for healing.
I left that hospital shaken up and unsettled. That night my perspective shifted immensely. The Lord reminded me of how much I have to be grateful for and how so often we forget to say thank you. I went to bed that night praying for all those that I saw, but also thanking the Lord for all He has given and done for me.
