I Said Hello

I said hello.

I said hello to Cambodia, Thailand, Malaysia, The Philippines, Zimbabwe, Zambia, Malawi, Ukraine, Romania, Albania, Spain, a list of eleven tattooed forever in this order upon my heart. As much as I was able, I gave everything every day to the beautifully unique humans of this world. Pieces of my heart are planted around the globe, my attempt to sow the Earth with diligence and love.

I said hello to discomfort, abandonment, and living with less. Surviving on $5 or less a day for food, living out of one backpack, and sleeping on floors for months at a time have taught me what I do and do not actually need to thrive in life. My belly was always satisfied, my clothes always covered me (and sometimes actually looked really cute), and my body was always able to find some measure of rest.

I said hello to intimacy with The Lord. I hear His voice with depth and clarity I never imagined possible. He delights in me, and loves to give me gifts. Rainbows and shooting stars and mountains and yellow flowers and smiles from babies and Dr. Pepper cans found in unexpected places–the goodness He’s shown me this year knows no end. He loves me, and I willingly allow myself to be romanced daily. I am the will of God, every step I take from here on out is one taken in full concert and assurance with Him.

I said hello to myself. I know who I am now. I know how to ask for what I need and not apologize for doing so. I know deeper what I can and cannot do. I know how to be well.

I said hello to forty strangers who have become more than family. My squadmates; who let me be the goof that I am, who taught me to be loved, who circled this globe with me. My teammates; squadmates, yes, but those who also saw me at my worst, who endured my anger, who sat in my tears, who witnessed this year’s worst failures, and still got up each day to stand beside me and love me with gospel truth. My mentor Jeremy; the pusher, whose vulnerability inspired me to do the same, the one who taught me “yes”, the one who encouraged my true self constantly, who always had a podcast to answer any question, and honored us with his dope drumming skills. My coaches, Keith and Karen; they who gifted me with books, setting my mind free, who always listened, who endured my word-vomit emails as I tried to figure some stuff out, who were a place of safety and love.

These things I treasure up in my heart, the hellos valued just as highly as this one overwhelming goodbye.

Yeah, I said goodbye.

And I watch as Jeremy, Keith, and Karen head off for the night, and I sit and watch my squadmates trickle off to bed, and I sit, burning eyes watching the stars, only four of the dearest humans still awake sitting with me on a porch in Spain overlooking the sea at 3 AM, and I sit knowing I need to go to bed but knowing that when I take off this dress and close these eyes, that’ll be it. Now, the Race is here, tomorrow it’s over.

But still, the time came, and the next day, I sit at our first goodbye at a gas station, Jeremy and Keith and Karen and Emily and Bethany and Haley and Erinn and Josh– those who led us this year– hugging and giving well wishes. And Erinn holds my face as I blubber about the goodness of it all, but also tell her golly it still hurts. She just smiles.

And I sit on a bus being held close by arms I trust, my tears finally dried up, thinking. Sleepless, I sort through the emotions and through the year and I compare the goodbye of home with the hellos of this year and thus, I decide, as I did one year ago, the only way to move forward is to continue to say hello.

And now, on an airplane drawing ever closer to America, I sit and tap out these words.

I say hello.

Hello, new season. Hello, celebration in knowing that I– I, Kayla Lynn Krynski– completed the World Race. Hello, new relationships and friendships and the rest of my life to explore and grow in the ones I made this year. Hello to dreams I didn’t know I had, desires I know will be fulfilled, and abilities I boldly claim. Hello to the beginning of the real race; hello to the rest of my life.

//

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you who have read my blogs, commented, encouraged, and blessed me so deeply by joining in this journey with me.

While my time blogging for the Race seems to have come to an end, my career as a writer certainly has not. I’m proud to announce the creation of a new blog where you are all more than invited to subscribe, read, comment, and continue journeying with me! I’ll post about it here when it’s up and ready and I will also post on Facebook (add me as a friend if we aren’t already!) about it– so be on the lookout for these next exciting steps!

Thank you all again.

Love always,
Kayla