Recently, I have been taking a class offered at my local church. The class focused on how to teach Sunday school. Though I have no desire at the moment to teach Sunday School I thought it would be helpful as I prepare for the World Race. We had a homework assignment this past week. We were given a few different passages of scripture and we were to choose one of them and write a devotional to present to the class leader that Sunday. It was a mock teaching so to speak. Anyway, I was less than excited about it at first. I just kept putting it off. Until Sunday morning came and I realized I had better come up with something- and fast. I read through the passages and asked the Lord which one He thought I should go with. He gave me 1 Samuel 17. This passage is the story of David and Goliath. I said, Ok lead me Lord. And it was like BAM!! Total download and wreckage all at once. It was SO GOOD! I felt that there were several different message God was trying to give me all at once! It was overwhelming and so needed!
Now for a very brief summation of the story of David and Goliath. (Again, you can read it all in 1 Samuel Chapter 17. The Israelites (God's chosen people) went to battle against the Philistines. The Philistines had this mighty warrior, named Goliath. He was a giant and all the other Israelites feared him. Goliath wanted to fight one Israelite, one on one. None of the Israelites wanted to fight him, so they ran and hid. For forty days this went on. Goliath would come out and challenge the Israelites, every morning and every evening and each time the Israelites would hide. The David came to the battle field one day. He was not scared of Goliath. He knew that God was on his side and so he had nothing to fear. Goliath again announced his challenge and David accepted. David went to battle with only 5 smooth stones and a sling shot. David defeated Goliath with one shot. The Philistine army ran away and the Israelites had the victory.
What God showed me through the passage was just how big Goliath was and how small David was. Goliath was "6 cubits and a span". This comes out to about 9 feet 9 inches tall. He wore all bronze armor, with his coat alone weighing about 125 lbs. The point of his spear weighed 15 lbs. Not only did he carry a spear but he also had a javelin on his back and a sword at his side. This was a giant man! Now David, on the other hand, was a young man. He was not considered strong enough or old enough to go to the battle between the Philistines and the Israelites. Three of his older brothers were already at the battlefield, but David was left to tend to the sheep. The only way David even made it to the battlefield that day was because his father sent him to give supplies to his brothers and to check up on them.
With this description alone, I could see why people did not think David could win. He was clearly outmatched. Even Saul, the King told David “You are not able to go out against this Philistine and fight him; you are only a young man, and he has been a warrior from his youth.” ( I Samuel 17: 33) Saul didn't think David had the experience needed to defeat such a foe. In verses 34-37, David tells Saul how he saved his sheep from a lion and a bear. He killed them with his bare hands. David says "The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine." (Verse 37) This was a big "Aha!" moment for me. David had seen God provide for him. He had seen the Lord rescue him before and he was confident that the Lord would rescue him again. No where in this passage was it written that the Lord told David he would be rescued. There is no "thus sayeth the Lord" moment, there is no promise. David just knew who God was, what He had already done for him and he knew that God could do it again. Ouch. I have known the Lord's goodness. I have seen him work in my life. I have seen him provide financially for previous mission trips, in amazing ways. He has proven his faithfulness to me. And yet I still have been doubting He will provide all of the funds for this race. David had no promise of rescue. He simply chose to trust God. Not only did he simply trust God, but he put himself in a position where he had to completely depend on God. He put himself in a position where God had to show up or he would die-literally. Looking at it on paper, Goliath was the better warrior. He was bigger and stronger than David. He had several different weapons at his disposal. He should have killed David. David trusted, David depended on God- and he was victorious. So why do I have such a hard time with dependence?
I have been reading Seth Barnes' book "Kingdom Journeys" and will you take a guess what the name of the chapter is that I am currently reading? You got it: "Dependence" (Hmm, maybe God is trying to speak to me? ;)) I read this quote last night and I want to share it:
"At the point where God is all you have, he will become all you need. Through this process, you learn to listen to his voice and obey." (Kingdom Journeys pg 140)
The rest of the chapter is full of stories of different people who placed themselves in a position where they HAD to depend on God to come through, and the riches of joy, love, abundance that the received from it. I want that! I want to know what it's like to hold nothing back, to seriously give up everything and be forced to depend on God to come through. So I am putting myself in somewhat of that position. With this mission trip comes a price, a $15,500 price to be blunt. And I do not have the money to pay for that. Heck, I don't have the money to pay for even a quarter of that! But I am called to go. I have this passion in my heart for this trip, to be stripped of everything superficial, to have every comfort I have known be taken away. I want to dive deeper into my relationship with God and learn to depend on Him for everything, from food to eat to a place to sleep. I am so ready to be broken, to be changed from the inside out. Physically, emotionally, I am more than ready to go. Financially, however, I'm not even close. I have a little over $1,000 raised so far! Glory to God! He has blessed me abundantly with people who are willing to help support me and encourage me.
To raise $14,500 more in the next six months, that is a challenge. But my God has provided for me before and just like David, I will chose to believe that He will do so again. MY GOD WILL COME THROUGH FOR ME! I am taking that first step of dependence. I am trusting that God will provide for my financial needs. As you are reading this, I ask that you would prayerfully consider supporting my race. If you feel God is leading you to give, you can click the "support me!" button to the left of this blog. Don't think that any number is too small! Every single bit helps! Thank you so much to those who have donated already. Thank you to those who have been praying for me! God is good and He will come through for me! May you all be blessed this day and several days to follow. Be filled with the Spirit this Christmas season!
