I’m almost finished with month 1 of the race and I’m not ready. They always tell you to come into the race with out expectations and you want to ignorantly say, “OH, I’m not.”
That is false. Unknowingly, you will come in with expectations.
I thought my expectations were rooted around story-telling. The stories I wanted to tell, the vlogs I wanted to create.
Turns out none of my unknown expectations were around storytelling. They were about what I would experience.
I thought that leaving wouldn’t be hard. I thought my biggest struggles on the race would be with my depression or anxiety. I DID NOT think that my biggest struggle month one would be food. There are so many things that I got so wrong about the race.
But there is beauty in that..
I didn’t think leaving would be hard because I didn’t think I could have life giving relationships between hosts, children, or workers at ministry.
I thought my ministry would revolve around videos. When in reality, videos can only give a glimpse into the beauty of ministry.
I have truly loved having my expectations blown away by the Lord.
We were told that ministry this month would be working with children on their english. While we have done a little little bit of that, ministry was not just english. My team has moved bricks on bricks on bricks. We helped build a road. We have shared our testimonies to teenagers all around Bogotá. We have gone on spirit led walks through the markets. We have prayed for so many strangers who need Jesus. We got so so close with our ministry host’s family that I still haven’t quite figured out how to say goodbye to them yet. I had a 10 year old boy give me more confidence in who God made me to be than any person I have met thus far in life.
I’m not ready to leave these kids. I’m not ready to leave my host family. I’m not ready to leave Bogotá, but that’s not how the Lord works. He doesn’t wait for me to be ready. If he did, I might never do anything to further the kingdom. He pushes me out of my comfort zone and then equips me when I am there.
I love this place, but I love the Lord more. That’s how I live my life. I love my friends, but I love the Lord more. I love my family, but I love the Lord more. I love my comforts, but I love the Lord more.
I have learned a lot month one, but I have one main take away. I am fully dependent on the Lord.
I’m not ready to move on, but I am fully dependent on the Lord to walk with me through this race step by step.
Ecuador.. We’re coming for you.
