The Climb!
This one is for all you Hannah Montana fans out there… THE CLIMB! I thought it was fitting because we’re going to monkey mountain this Saturday hahaha.
And also because I’m learning, growing, and being challenged more than ever.
I’m going to be real and vulnerable with you guys. My life looks a little bit like this:
I sleep on the floor with 6 other girls in a tight room with no AC, a lot of bugs, and even more humidity. To say that I’m out of my comfort zone is an understatement. Our luxuries consist of the occasional mango we eat at dinner and wifi about once a week. I’m learning to thank God for the simple things like water fights in the heat of the day, the invention of fans, my amazing team, boys that will kill the giant spiders in your shower, and Oreos. Lots and lots of Oreos.
Not only am I out of my comfort zone physically, but spiritually as well. I’m no longer surrounded by a large community of Christ followers who support and encourage me in my faith. Instead, the majority of the people within the village have temples in their front yards, placing items of offering in these structures throughout the day. It has definitely been an eye-opening and difficult experience. But with this new way of life, my team and leader have been so incredibly encouraging and uplifting. We’ve grown closer to God and one another… reminding each other to step out in boldness and faith.
With all this change, I’ve had a lot of personal time with the Lord. And recently, I’ve been kinda wrestling with God. He’s showed me that I haven’t completely surrendered my performance nature to Him. There are times when I tend to mask my emotions or problems, acting like I have it all together. SPOILER ALERT: I don’t. Nobody does. To quote Hannah Montana once again, “Nobody’s perfect, you live and you learn it!” (Except for Jesus!) haha. That’s my little spin on the song. Anyways, there are still so many areas in my life where I want the control, and surrendering those things to Him seems impossible. There are still parts of me that I’m hiding from myself and the world. But God sees it. And WITH TIME, He will reveal more of Himself, and therefore more of myself, to me. But this process takes time. And if you know me, patience is not one of my strong suits. I want results ASAP. But the Lord is reminding me (whether I like it or not) that He isn’t going to reveal everything to me overnight. So I have to have patience and trust while I follow Him. It feels like I’m blindfolded and unsure of what He has for me and my life. But that’s where faith comes in. It takes obedience, which is costly. It takes surrendering. Which I’m stubborn as heck, so that’s not easy. And it takes time.
I will never know everything about God or myself. Which drives me kinda crazy sometimes. But each day, as I step out into the unknown with God, I’m learning more and more.
So here I am. My people-pleasing, “I have it all together”, stubborn, impatient, and type A self. And despite all of those things, God has never left me… and He has never left you!
Pretty insane.
Thank you for taking the time out of your day to read about the ways I’m learning and growing as I climb this mountain and face these challenges. I will be posting again this week, focusing more on ministry and the opportunities we’ve had as a team!
Have a wonderful Wednesday!
-Kat… C-A-T Meow meow CAT!
