I remember the fall of 2015 very clearly, after I had left college and moved back to my hometown because God asked me to. I remember the confusion and frustration that came with it. I had no home to come back to, so I put all my furniture and knick knacks in storage. My clothes all stayed in suitcases in my trunk. I got a job at a local cafe, and with my dog I stayed over at my sisters some nights and my brothers other nights, both living in rented rooms at people’s houses.
Honestly, I felt homeless, detached from any stability. Leaving college I felt like I was then working towards nothing.
But God knew. Because He always does.
Soon I got a better job at a medical office, and then the World Race entered my sphere. Was this my next step? Maybe. I remember talking to my mentor about it to get some advice, to just share what I felt God was calling me to next. The day we talked about it in her prayer room she asked how much money would I need to raise. Grabbing a sharpie she wrote it on the wall of prayers and said “God, we know you can do it, we are asking for this much money to come in for Hope to go on the World Race.”
At the time I didn’t believe it could be done. I hadn’t even applied yet. I didn’t have a home to even feel settled enough to start preparing to leave. So, that’s where I started. I prayed for a home to come before I would apply. God already knew what was going to happen with that anyways, and in January 2016 my siblings and I moved into our blessing house. And then I applied for the World Race.
I got accepted in late March. My plan was for a January 2017 route. God soon started speaking to me about leaving in October instead, and I didn’t listen until July. One month later I was going to training camp. Three months later I was launching to Honduras, country number one. 11 months of growth, miracles, signs and wonders, healings, salvations, love, fear, leaps of faith, boldness, friendship building and life change followed.
After returning in August of 2017 I rested. Settled into a job in November. The thought of alumni squad leading having been planted in my heart in October. Praying about that for months and questioning if I should. In February of 2018, before leaving work one day, the thought to apply for squad leading came into my mind again. I said to God, “but I don’t know if this is what you’re actually asking of me,” and He simply replied, “stop second guessing it and just apply.”
Two months later I was accepted to squad lead with a group in August. In June I went to training camp for two weeks, met my new forever friends of co-leaders, and came to quickly love this new squad of world-changing Jesus lovers. With lots of prayers and funds under my belt I launched out of the United States again and into our first stop, Ukraine.
The next five months were filled with more tears from pains of personal growth and spiritual growth, more miracles, signs and wonders, healings and salvations, serving alongside other members of the body, evangelizing, loving people that were going unseen, telling stories and discipling the squad, being challenged by them and my co-leaders, unraveling more of my past to find greater healing, and reveling at God’s unending, wondrous grace and love for me.
One day after the New Year of 2019 I began my series of flights home with one of my co-leaders. Feelings of sadness and excitement flooding my soul. I knew I was at the end of my chapter with World Race. One of the greatest chapters in my story-book yet, its final page coming to a close. Wrestling with the grief of its end, knowing that the sadness is not because it was a disappointment, but because it was so good.
I know where my next chapter begins, and it isn’t in my home place of Virginia. I’ll be there for a short time, but not for long. Soon I will spread out my wings and fly from this nest to another. My landing place?
Portland, Oregon.
What’s in Portland? I don’t know, other than God, a bunch of hipsters and tons of good coffee. I don’t know yet where I’ll be living, or where I’ll work, or who my friends will be, or what church I’ll go to. This next season looks like a bunch of “i don’t knows,” but what I do know is Jesus called Peter out of the boat, and with just a little faith Peter walked on water with Him. I’m putting all the faith that I have into this one and walking toward Him. Where my father calls me I will go.
One of the girls on this squad gave me a key necklace recently. It says “fly.” She said she knew it was meant for me because I told her that this next season felt a lot like God removing the ground from under me and showing me how to fly. But, the funny thing is that the ground was just an illusion anyway. Where He is leading me to is solid ground.
See you around somewhere,
Hope
If you want to help me get to Portland, you can pray for me, and/or send money to my Pay Pal, [email protected].
In April and July I will get to go see this squad again for one week each time. In order to do so I need to be fully funded. I’m just $651 away from my final goal. If you read this blog, would you donate? Any amount helps. Thank you so much, I appreciate your support more than words can say. *EDIT* I am now fully-funded!!!
