In case you didn’t know, Bali is in Indonesia. However, it‘s very very very different from where I spent most of my month here.
INDONESIA. This has been one of the hardest months of my life. There were many times I didn’t love people as well as I could have. (That’s okay. I asked and God said he forgives me. I have the chance to do better next time.) I ran to God daily in surrender because I knew I couldn’t do it on my own. I can’t count the number of times I wrote in my prayer journal “I NEED you” or “I surrender” or “please just take charge” This is exactly where God wants me to be all the time.
I was asked yesterday by one of my squad leaders how I was doing and after a moment of thinking about it I said that I felt like I was back to normal. This month I have not been myself. In the past I have struggled with depression and this month I felt that creeping up again. I felt overwhelmed and for the first time on the race I felt homesick. I just felt like I was totally broke down. Normally I am a very positive and excited about life kind of person. That was not me for the majority of this month. I just felt off in every aspect.
I’ve been out on the field away from America for 6 months now. I’m over halfway done with the World Race. It’s been absolutely amazing but it’s draining for sure. Over the past four days my squad and I have been able to have what we call a “debrief” in Bali. Our leaders from America flew out here to meet up with us and pour into us. During this time we get to rest, spend time with Jesus, and just have fun with each other.
I didn’t realize how badly I needed this time until I was asked that simple question. “How are you doing?” This month was hard but because this organization wants to take care of me, I got to take four days to debrief in a place most people only dream of going. Because they love me well, I got to say I was back to my normal, positive, excited about life self after spending this time here.
You may not have noticed any change in me this month or you may have been able to tell a difference. Either way I would like to say that I am back and ready to head for the Philippines! I am pumped to continue on this wild adventure! And I’m excited to bring you guys along with me!
Thank you to everyone for continually supporting me in all that I’m doing!
