The weekend before last we went down to Pattaya to visit a couple teams who are stationed there this month. We had promised to visit each other at some point and they were the ones by the beach so it was an easy choice as to who would visit who. It was a beautiful 2 days of friends, sand, lots of watery ocean, and fun times.
Those of you who know me well probably already know how much I love being in water. I have spent 6 hours straight in a hot tub (not the wisest of decisions but worth it) if that helps give you an idea. I could grow gills and be the happiest little fish in the sea. It wouldn’t bother me a bit. (Although I suppose I would miss breathing air.)
Needless to say, an afternoon chilling on the beach and spending the next day jumping off a boat and snorkeling around some of Thailand’s smaller islands was absolutely glorious.
During all that time in the water I thought a lot about waves.
I’ve always connected God with the ocean. It’s mysterious, big, powerful, and goes on farther than you can ever see. When I’m in the water, and especially the ocean, it’s like being in God’s presence. I’m more mobile, lighter, freer, yet completely enveloped. I can go wherever I want, yet am guided by the current. I feel safer there than in any other state.
The thing about waves is that they’re continuous. While stand/swimming I found myself getting hit by wave after wave of water. Some of them were more forceful than others but each one still had pressure to it and they kept on rolling in.
At one point while I was swimming I decided to swim out a little farther, bit by bit, until I could no longer touch the ocean floor. As I did this I noticed that while I wasn’t standing on my own, but rather floating in the water, the waves weren’t as noticeable. They weren’t hitting me so much anymore.
And when I actually swam towards the waves, I hardly noticed them at all.
Lately I’ve been experiencing some interesting spiritual and emotional waves and sometimes it seems like all I can do is brace myself while they pass through.
In this I’m learning that just because I’m in spiritual uproar, doesn’t mean I’ve done anything bad. I’m not being punished and I can be in a genuinely good place with God and experience spiritual winter at the same time.
I’m also learning the importance of sitting in what God’s led me to. It’s so much more natural to pick up the pace when life feels hard. We want to sprint right through so we can get to summer. But it’s so much more powerful, so much more freeing to stick it out. It’s more healing to actually experience all that it is.
Instead of swimming away from the waves, I’m trying to go right into the pressure. Even though it’s still hard, there’s an amazing peace when you know you’re right where God wants you- even if it seems like Hell this second.
When you have the courage to “go there” the forces that seem so strong, lose a portion of their power. They can’t hold you anymore because you aren’t just standing there anymore.
When you choose to move, they can’t keep you there.
So today I challenge you to swim towards that which seems too strong for you (using your God given discernment of course). Swim into the waves that seem so ominous and experience the beauty of God’s presence as He catches you in His warm embrace.
Then you don’t have to keep on swimming. You can just float in His strength and goodness.
