What to expect when you’re expecting…a World Racer to come home.
I’ll be home in a couple short weeks. That’s a sentence I never thought would actually be true. There are days when I have to remind myself that God called me to a full 11 months, even though I’m ready to check out now. And days when the thought of going home scares me and I wish it wasn’t ending so fast.
I’m a different Katie than the one that left in September. I am coming home with a library of experiences and stories that have changed the way I think, operate, and view the world. I have a better awareness of myself, a new appreciation for the people around me and those around the world, and a deeper love for my Savior.
A lot has happened this year, most of which I don’t yet know how to accurately convey with words. “How was your trip?” will be a really hard question to answer, at least hard to answer truthfully and meaningfully. That is like me asking you, “How was your year?” A lot happens in a year!
Really, my World Race was awesome and it sucked. I really enjoyed it and at times I didn’t. The community was great and then there were those times when it wasn’t. Ministry was so fulfilling and I felt like I made a difference. And I felt useless and frustrated. I felt so close to God. And I felt so distant from God. I loved the people I was with, but sometimes I wanted to run away from them. It was sometimes a thrilling adventure, but it was also boring and monotonous daily life. The food was amazing! Except for when it wasn’t. I’ve been amazed, recked, and heartbroken and I’ve been indifferent and apathetic…
When you do ask me how my trip was, I’ll probably tell you it was awesome. And I won’t be lying because through the awesome, the hard, the easy, and the uncomfortable, I was strengthened, I grew, I learned, I had incredible experiences, and I saw more of who God is. I wouldn’t trade this year for anything and I know I’m living a story that God wrote long ago.
If you want to know more, here are some suggested questions:
What was your favorite ministry? Favorite country?
What is one way you’ve seen yourself change?
Tell me about a person you met on the race that you really connected with.
What was daily life like for you in Peru? Malawi? Thailand?
What was the hardest part? the best part?
What is one of your favorite memories?
Where did you see God show up?
When are you free to have lunch/dinner/coffee and tell me more?
Other things to expect…I’ll probably freak out looking at food prices and clothing prices, maybe try to convert the price into some foreign currency to compare it to what it would be somewhere in South America, Africa or Asia, and then exclaim how ridiculous it is. I’ll probably be overwhelmed by how many choices I have in my closet after living out of a backpack for a year and I may use an excessive amount of hand gestures while talking, forgetting that you actually do understand my English. Give me grace when I unnecessarily put America down, comparing it to another country or a different way of life. And give me grace when I get absurdly excited about a Chipotle burrito, a fresh salad, or some boneless correctly identified meat.
A lot of my sentences will probably start with “My teammate on the race….” or “When I was in…” so I apologize in advance for relating every conversation back to a story from the last year. Being away from my squad will be very hard and very weird. It hasn’t even sunk in yet that my new best friends, people who know me in a different way than anyone at home, won’t be by my side in a few days. I’m going to miss my world race family a lot. Don’t take it personally when I ball my eyes out on my first night home, sitting alone on my own bed in my own room. But at the same time, I haven’t been alone for the last 11 months, so don’t be offended if I want to hide alone in my room or just aimlessly drive my car by myself. There will be times when I don’t feel like talking about the Race and times when I won’t stop talking about it…
I want you to try to understand what I went through this past year, how I’ve grown, and what my relationship with Jesus has become. I’d love for you to open your mind to hear about cultures, lifestyles, beliefs, and mind sets that may not match yours. Honestly, one of my biggest fears of returning home is not being understood. And furthermore, being judged because your will for my life doesn’t match God’s will or my own will for my life.
While the World Race has been life changing, I’m still human. I do believe over the past year God has transformed be into something better, someone more like Him and more like He created me to be, but I am going to mess up like anyone else. At times, I’m going to suck at loving you well and I won’t represent Christ well. I hope I’m done putting pressure on myself to be someone I’m not, so more than anything I want you see more of the true me when you see me.
See you in 11 days, America! And Maryland, I’m coming for you in 15 days!!
Love from Vietnam!
