“Squatty potties. Community bucket showers behind a tarp. I’m sharing a twin sized bed with my teammate-friend Taylor. There are 6 other girls and their years’ worth of belongings in our tiny bedroom. We cook our own meals with a stovetop on a patio, we have no refrigerator to store food or any other kitchen appliances. The electricity turns off randomly for half the day and we never know when it will turn back on. There are flies everywhere. There is no air conditioning, bugs are everywhere (and geckos)! It’s either 96 and unbelievably humid or 93 and raining. We have lots of responsibility, schedules filled with teaching, preaching, cooking and cleaning. Our entertainment consists of a library of books on theology and biblical studies. This month literally hands us every opportunity to have a bad attitude and complain, but I have yet to find a bad attitude. This community (21 of us!) has chosen to be thankful for what we’ve been given and it’s changing the atmosphere. We’ve been finding our joy in God alone, and that joy he gives us is contagious and it’s powerful. The house has been full of laughter, encouragement and positive attitudes.
My team this month has the opportunity to pour into missions college students here in Myanmar. We get to help them with their English and teach them about the Bible. We run worship and a message twice a day Sunday through Friday. Our schedules are busy pouring into these students and into each other. I believe God is going to enable us to make an impact on these students and to help guide them towards his will. But I also believe that this month will be a month that changes a lot of us on the inside. God has our full attention here with no distractions and I believe he’s going to come through however we need him to.
“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another- and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” -Hebrews 10:23
It’s so refreshing to see this squad going into month 6 of this incredible journey and still be full of joy and laughter. We are living out this verse and we are seeing the fruit from the Lord because of it. We are holding onto the hope that God is faithful, and spurring each other to love and do good by first loving God and loving each other. I can’t tell you how important it is to find things to be thankful for no matter the circumstances. If you’re struggling to find joy through it all, write down what you’re thankful for.
And on that note, here is my list of things I’m thankful for in Myanmar.
-my team that makes me laugh so hard I can’t breathe
-my comfortable sleeping pad
-toilet paper
-good smelling bug spray
-clean drinking water
-mosquito nets
-rain!”
I wrote this blog the night before my sweet Grandma Beulah passed away. I woke the next morning to find that my parents had called AIM’s emergency line to pass on the news to me of her passing. To read back on this blog that I wrote just the night before, it’s crazy to see how God was going to use this blog to bring comfort to me. It’s so easy being here in Myanmar to feel like this is the final straw. I’ve already been stripped of all my comforts and now I’m facing the loss of my grandma. It’s so easy to feel like I have no comforts here, but God is reminding me that I have him, and that is all I need. Nothing else can satisfy.
As amazing as a hug from my cousin Hanna would be right now, God is the only thing that can bring peace to my heart. It’s been immeasurably harder than I expected to deal with this away from home, it sucks not being able to be in communication with friends and family, but I trust that God is taking care of me across the world. He’s holding my every moment. It’s hard, it’s messy, and some parts of the day I wonder how I will ever get through this, but I’m learning the hard way that when I call on the name of God, he will answer. My cries aren’t falling on deaf ears.
My list of things I’m thankful for looks a little different today than it did a few days ago.
-I’m thankful for a team that has given me as many hugs and snacks as I’ve needed and has still managed to make me laugh
-I’m thankful for Greg, who had to be the one to get the call and share that news with me
-I’m thankful for Gabby for crying with me right after I found out
-I’m thankful for the notes that my squad mates have left on my Bible and my pillow
-I’m thankful for an iPod full of music that reminds me of how good my God is
-I’m thankful that Greg and Todd let me use them as a human punching bag (don’t worry, I’m not physically capable of hurting them!)
-I’m thankful for the 21 and a half years that I got to be a part of Beulah Hurley’s story
-I’m thankful for the times she’s embarrassed me in public with her slightly inappropriate jokes
-I’m thankful for the days last summer that she donated to my missions if I would help her with household chores and errands. We got to sit around the laundromat one afternoon as she recalled the many times God has shown up in her life. She also got to share stories with me of when her and Grandpa were dating.
-I’m thankful for the many, many, many Christmas sweaters that she’s loaned me for all the Christmas parties throughout the years. (Still sorry for referring to them as “ugly” Christmas sweaters oops, sorry grandma!)
-I’m thankful for all the birthday dinners she’s cooked me, and for her underlining all her favorite words in all my birthday cards
-I’m thankful for her teaching me how great gospel music is, as she proudly sang along to her CD’s in her car
-I’m thankful for her living her life to the fullest, and teaching me what it looks like to be a woman of God
-I’m thankful for the love she’s poured out on me, the prayers she’s said nightly over me, and the smiles and laughter she’s brought into my life
Grandma, you were like none other. Your heart was pure gold and your smile really changed so many lives. Thank you for setting the bar so high for me, I’ll spend my life hoping to reach it.
To my friends and family back home, I would give anything to be with you guys during this time. I hope you are all being extra nice to each other and giving each other lots of hugs. It’s just me, God, and the wide-open fields over here in Myanmar so you bet I’ve spent all my time thinking of you guys and praying for each of you all. I love you all so much.
It’s been a struggle to find my joy the last few days, but I know that God is the source of my strength. He’s guiding me day by day and holding me in my weak moments. I’m learning to depend on him in a whole new way. Please pray that I continue to rely on him and him alone. Also, please give hugs to my family next time you see them!
Thank you for all the prayers I know you guys are praying. I may not be able to communicate with any of you, but your prayers are felt, I promise.
