I was recently challenged to write about the “Least Of These” the widows and orphans and what story has impacted my life and my walk with Christ.
So I’m sitting there thinking about what I could write. Maybe i’ll write about the widow I met in South Asia. Maybe i’ll talk about the orphans i’ve met on my travels and then…
I thought why don’t I write MY story. Now I know most of you have heard my story but for those of you who haven’t here is a big snippet of my life.
My father died when I was 8, my mother died when I was 19, and I lost my oldest brother too when I was 20.
Now when I tell people my story they think, oh that poor soul. She was dealt the bad hand in life. People think i’m little orphan Annie. I see pity in their eyes and I hate it.
Yeah some of you might think that’s rude but honestly when I see people pity me it makes me a little upset.
I’m bruised not broken.
See I don’t think I was dealt a bad hand in life. Two years ago I did, but today as I write this I don’t.
Two years ago when I lost my mom I went into a major depression. My mother was my role model and best friend. To lose her was the hardest thing I have ever had to go through.
So I became an orphan on March 12th, 2012. The weeks and months after that date were some of the saddest and most loneliest times of my life.
Now when you think of a nineteen year old who lost both her parents your mind doesn’t think orphan. You think she just lost her parents.
But I was and still am an orphan. I miss my parents more than I can say. No one will get to walk me down the aisle on my wedding day. They will never see my children, I can’t call and ask for advice. I miss their laughs, their smiles, I miss THEM!
Yes by state and government standards I was a legal adult but when I lost my mom I felt like a small child. I was screaming and crying for my parents to come and help me, but no matter how hard I cried or how loud I screamed I would never get them back.
Most of you know I went to Africa last year and most of you know how much the Lord healed me in those two months. He pulled me out of my depression and put me in a country where every step I took I had to come to Him. There was no way around it.
All bitterness and anger and depression completely disappeared from my life and I was a new adopted daughter in Christ. In fact I was always the Lord’s kid but this was the first time I ever realized it.
The Lord has put some amazing people in my life who have looked after me like I was their daughter and welcomed me into their homes with open arms. I will forever be grateful to have them in my life.
Now back to before how I said I hate when people pity me.
The reason for my hate is because I wasn’t dealt the bad hand in life. My cards just look very different from everyone else. My story is special and my life is unique. The Lord has used my story and is using my life for some amazing things!
I can relate to so many people and relate to their hurt that not many people can. Now i’m not saying you have to be an orphan to relate to one but the fact that I can share my story of hope and tell them that Christ is greater than any hurt or loss they might face is amazing.
It is an honor to have this story.
I never thought I would say that but honestly, it is a privilege to serve the Lord and the fact that He let me have this specific story is so cool. He chose me out of all the people in the world!
What an honor!!!
My story is not going to waste it is going to be told and the Lord is going to use me and my story to bring Him glory and give hope to those who have no hope. That is my heart’s burden, plain and simple.
My story can not and will not save people. I do not want any recognition or praise for it, or people to think dang she is so cool and strong. Um no! I’m weak and without the Lord’s hand on my life I would be dead or living a life full of sadness and darkness. It is because of my Savior that I am alive today to even write this. He is the one who gave me the story so I owe everything to my Jesus.
I am orphan and i’m proud of it! All praise and glory to the Lamb!
Thank you to everyone who’s reading this and I want to thank everyone who’s been there for me to push me through times of hardship. You made me laugh when I needed a good laugh and gave an ear when I just wanted someone to listen and you gave me a hug when I was sad. I love you all more than you’ll ever know!
Love,
Kathryn
P.S. Make sure to donate! So I can continue to share my story 🙂
