There are a lot of things I can reflect on now at this age, and see how much I neglected the blessings in my life growing up...
-Starting with one… I remember growing up in Sheridan, Wy, people would visit and go on and on about how beautiful it there, and I thought, “What are you talking about? This is my normal life, I don’t see anything special.” THEN, wow, when I went to Oklahoma for college and came back that first summer, I remember driving to Dayton and looking through my windshield, thinking that time, “This is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen in my life, I really took advantage of this.”
-I also neglected my education at times… I regret cramming for tests in school, because, to be quite honest, knowledge and simple things like, knowing who JKF is, and what he did, and knowing the placement of each state in the U.S., is something highly encouraged in real life. A real quote by me in South Africa- “You know knowledge is growing on me with age.”
I could go on, but the reason I that I am sitting here writing this blog now is because I neglected to realize how the Lord blessed me with my Dad.
You know, I sometimes hear the saying, “Parents can only do so much to shape a child’s life.” Granted there may be some truth to that but I am going to tell you right now… Dads…
YOU SHAPE YOUR DAUGHTERS LIFE MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW.
I am proof of that.
From a young age, little girls ALWAYS want the affirmation from their Daddy’s that they are beautiful. I am sure many of us, daughters, can recall times that we got dressed in our princess outfits and ran straight to our dads, awaiting the moment for their eyes to look at you, smile, and to tell you that you are beautiful, that you are captivating!
Daddy am I captivating?????
I can recall numerous times that I would go shopping and the first thing I wanted to do was to show my dad my new clothes. I remember one time specifically, when we were in Gillette, Wyoming having Thanksgiving with some of our neighbors, the Stevermers, that just recently moved to there from Sheridan, and I got to go shopping with my Mom and Sandi, to buy some new clothes for my band concert coming up. Oh, yeah, fun fact, I was in band for 6 years…. don’t hate, I rocked that Baritone and it was worth every A on my report card. Anyway, so after some time of Sandi helping me convince my mom that I should wear PANTS, because, as a baritone player, my legs needed to be open while in the band concert, I picked my outfit. A pair of black velvet pants and a dark blue silk button-up top, stylin’, right???! Thanks : )
So we get back to the house, and my dad tells me to show him, so I pull my clothes out, and he looks at me strange and he says that he wants to see it on. So after my cheeks turn red and try I to convince him otherwise… I mean, there were boys around, I couldn’t just model my clothes… EMBARRASSING! I ended up walking upstairs and put them on and came down… needless to say, somehow the whole thing, literally turned into me modeling. Like,…. we have pictures to prove it to this day. (see below) I am standing in front of their brick arched fireplace posing, feeling a combination of flat out embarrassment and feeling like a princess. I keep posing as my brothers pop in and out of the photos making funny faces, while the whole time my dad is telling me how nice I look.
My Daddy thinks I am captivating!
Growing up, multiple Saturdays a month my Dad would take me to breakfast. Not my brothers, and me, but me, just me. Dang, did that anyways make me feel special. In FACT, I remember one Saturday, sitting in the first booth by the window at Perkins (booth #11 to be exact, and I know this because I worked there for 4 years), Dad asked me if I had ever tried eggs benedict, and I said no. He continued to convince me to try it, so I did… I mean, we both have CRAZY similar tastes in food.
10 some years later-
Ask me my favorite breakfast foods???? My answer would be, eggs benedict! Thanks Dad!
So I look back and think, how much knowing that my Dad thought I was beautiful, changed everything about my life. Because, girls start off at a very young age wanting to be validated and beautiful to the opposite sex, and I knew without a doubt, that my Dad, thought I was beautiful…. so consequently, when I reached my teenage years I was not craving for male attention so much that I looked to fulfillment in it. At the end of the day, no matter what happened, I knew my Dad was there.
I think Dads are supposed to reflect God’s heart in how they love their daughters.
I knew that there was NOTHING I could do that would make my Dad ‘unlove’ me. There was nothing I could do that would make him disown me. Sure, there were times he was disappointed in me but I never thought that affected the way he loved me.
I started thinking about girls who grow up thinking the opposite of me… does their view of God, their heavenly Daddy change? Do they feel like God could ‘unlove’ them? Do they feel like what they do could affect the way He loves them? As I sat with that thought, I came to the conclusion that often times, that may be true, and my heart broke. It broke, but then was simultaneously filled with an unexplainable amount of thankfulness. Thankful that because of my earthy daddy… I saw my heavenly DADDY, as a God of love. A God who would not run from me, A God who, if he had an office, put pictures of me up. A God who, was interested and invested in my life, despite His occasional disappointment. A God who, had enough love for me, that countered any disappointment.
So on this Father’s Day, Dad, thank you for being captivated by me, and now I understand how God is captivated by me, not because I earned it, but because I am HIS daughter.
P.S.
(Little extra something if you have time, this video/song below is wonderful)
