“I like your Christ, but not your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” -Gandhi
I am not a Christian anymore. I am defining a Christian as what so many of us have become: someone who accepts the title, but doesn’t commit to the job description. Someone who doesn’t practice what they preach.
I have been a Christian who has set a standard and expectation of who a Christian should be, but only based upon how they are on the outside. They should go to church, they should read their Bible, they should go to the Bible Study. They should only be friends with “good influences.” They shouldn’t curse. They should “look nice” for church, which means they should wear a mask.
A Christian preaches that God loves all people, but doesn’t accept a lesbian into the church. Sure, she’ll be there, and everyone will know, but she won’t be talked to. She won’t be worthy of their love. A Christian tells a homeless person to come to church, because Jesus can only be found under a steeple. A Christian is the man I saw on the street last week, yelling that everyone would go to hell. People were turning away from him and walking away quickly. He straightened his tie, but continued ignoring the three handicapped people on the sidewalk begging for money. He was literally driving people away from Jesus.
“The Church is what I feel alienated by, not God. I feel loved and accepted by God and Jesus. It’s the politics of the Church is what made me feel not welcome.” -Jonathan Van Ness, Queer Eye
A church seems to be thriving when everyone follows the rules. And then an elder has an affair. The pastor gets suicidal. And the people in the church don’t notice, because they’re too busy arguing over something that doesn’t really matter. The pastor doesn’t get suicidal because of the church, but because he feels like he can’t talk about what he’s actually going through, and he spirals. Alone.
A Christian should only be one thing: a follower of Jesus. A follower of Jesus reflects Jesus, because they do what he did. Sure, maybe they choose to go to church, not to curse, and even put Bible verses as their Instagram captions. But it’s because they are overflowing with Jesus, and want to be more like the one who brings them full life.
Jesus spent all his time with the lowest class of society; the liars, thieves, prostitutes, the addicted, and the homeless. He talked to people, and he taught them gently. He didn’t only go to church, but he made a church out of the people around him every day of the week. Most importantly, nowhere in the Bible does it have a story of conversion. It only has conversations. Jesus did not convert us to a religion, a list of rules to obey. He invited us into a relationship with him.
Jesus’ main group of friends, his disciples, were followers of Jesus. Jesus didn’t go find his disciples with a checklist, eliminating the ones who weren’t good enough for him. Jesus simply walked up to these men, who were in the middle of their everyday jobs, and said, “Follow me.” They could tell that this man was different than the Christians they knew. They knew they needed to get to know him. They didn’t clean up first or repent of all their sins. They simply got up and followed him.
I sound like a hypocrite. I sound like I am being passive-aggressive to people I know personally. I know, I’m literally on a mission trip right now. But, I’m telling you about who I used to be. I have done every single one of these things. I have tried to be the perfect Christian. I have tried to be the perfect pastor’s daughter, because that’s what people expected. But that’s not what God expects. There are no perfect followers of Jesus. God knows we will mess up, have problems, and get lost. But, instead of punishing us with his laws, he gives us grace with his love.
“As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at a tax booth, and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he rose and followed him. And as Jesus reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were reclining with Jesus and his disciples. And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to the disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” But when he heard it, he said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick.” – Matthew 9:33
- if you need some context, this book was written by Matthew himself. Here, Jesus is in Israel around 1st Century C.E. The significance of the tax collectors were that they were generally pretty hated, because they pocketed some of the money that the people were paying for taxes. So, the poor people kept having to pay more taxes, and the tax collectors kept getting richer. The Pharisees were like the Christians here, big on religion and rules, but not connected to the heart of God.
I am done with the religion of Christianity. I am choosing a relationship with Jesus. No matter who we are, we have a place at his table.
Love,
Kate
If you want to start a conversation with me, let me know in the comments. If you don’t like or agree with something here, please drop your phone number or email in the comments. I’d love to understand your perspective.
